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Dating, Relationships and Marriage Thread


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@Spike can you imagine your life without her in it? Be it where you are now or back home in Aus. 

If the answer is yes, it sounds like the decision is made in your own mind and then it's just going through that journey, painful as it may be, of coming out of the relationship. If the answer is no, it's still worth fighting for and coming to a solution where you're both satisfied. 

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10 hours ago, Spike said:

So essentially I'm going on a holiday for a month and half over Christmas, I'm going back to my hometown to spend time with my family. I said I'll return this last time but when I get back I'm preparing to move back to Australia by the mid of the year. I told I need her to say 'I want to come too' and not any wishy washy 'I'll try' or 'We'll see how things go' bullshit, I never meant to stay here this long, I never wanted to, and quite frankly I'm fed up with the needle not being pushed in either direction, I'm done waiting for you to 'be ready' I'm going whether you come or not. Obviously I said it in a much nicer manner but that is the gist of it. Living here is affecting my mental health, I feel trapped, I don't feel comfortable, I'm getting disconnected with my family, friends, and culture, when my grandmother died it kind of broke me a little, I feel so guilty that I hardly had a relationship with her since high school, she was so kind to me but I was so 'out of sight' and 'out of mind' for her dementia, now I'm scared that it could happen to my friends or my mother, or anyone else.

I don't know how old you are buddy but life and relationships always spring something up and hit you smack in the face and it looks like it's happening to you, I can't class this as similar to me and the wife but when we married and I was ready to be demobbed from the army I had a choice of either returning to Scotland with my new bride or returning back to Australia.

We sat down together and talked all about it, the ifs of Scotland and the ifs of Aussie land, the wife was all prepared to follow me to Australia but I wanted to see Scotland as I had never been there and my mother came from Glasgow and 3 of my eldest sisters were born there so we put the moving back to Australia for the time being on hold and left for the Bonnie Land.

Life just moved on gradually when we settled in Scotland and had a son & daughter but I found out over the years of marriage that the wife was scared shit of anything creepy crawly like spiders, moths, daddy long legs, etc and I told her that I knew for a fact she would never settle down out there, the only plus side for her in going to Australia is the heat as she loves hot weather.

But the wife left the decision up to me and said whatever or wherever we moved to she would go, it's been like that now for over 40 years of our marriage as we have lived (work-related) down South a couple of times but always ended back up in Scotland and have come to the conclusion that we will end our days here.

You my friend are your own master and it looks like you need a relationship with someone who has to give a little in and both think 50-50 together then you would know if the relationship at this particular time is worth it, go back to Aussie land over Christmas time and enjoy it, these are just my thoughts from an old man that has been through the ups and downs in life.

P.S. The wife still said she would love to live in Aussie land but admits that now we have 3 grandsons the thought of not seeing them regularly is a no-goer for her AND me.

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11 minutes ago, Spike said:

I don’t get this. I can’t be optimistic in a bad situation?

I was just kidding. You sounded pessmistic yesterday, and optimistic today. I am rooting for you that everything works out. 

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12 minutes ago, Tommy said:

I was just kidding. You sounded pessmistic yesterday, and optimistic today. I am rooting for you that everything works out. 

I am pessimistic today but I’m trying not to be. It’s about perseverance

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Sounds complicated... neither of you are seeing eye to eye on the matter, If you have given up some considerable time to be with her there it would be nice for her to at least offer the same even if it was just to see how it went.. How long have you both been together @Spike?

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25 minutes ago, Bluewolf said:

Sounds complicated... neither of you are seeing eye to eye on the matter, If you have given up some considerable time to be with her there it would be nice for her to at least offer the same even if it was just to see how it went.. How long have you both been together @Spike?

About nine years give or take 

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52 minutes ago, Devil-Dick Willie said:

Cunt I walked further to school than the distance from England and portugal. It's hardly the same. 

Your feet must be in need of some TLC. @MUFC where you at bro... 

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3 minutes ago, Devil-Dick Willie said:

Must be hell for @Whiskey to visit such a nation too. I'm sure there's nothing to do there. Seems like a poor country. Full of empty spaces and wasted coastline. 

It’s a problem all right. I haven’t been there but it must be hell sitting on one of those beaches, listening to bizarro Spanish, while bikini clad waitresses feed me francesinha and pouring me beirao. Instead I’m dodging bullets and Ford F150s

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4 hours ago, Spike said:

It’s a problem all right. I haven’t been there but it must be hell sitting on one of those beaches, listening to bizarro Spanish, while bikini clad waitresses feed me francesinha and pouring me beirao. Instead I’m dodging bullets and Ford F150s

It's a living nightmare mate.

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It's our wedding anniversary today and we have chalked up 48 years together, it's been a long haul and I have experienced the plates, cups & saucers flung at me by my wee darling plus getting hit over the head with a frying pan and an old video remote controller when they first came out and looked like and felt like a bloody brick, just the normal things in married life. O.o

Luckily we did our celebrations yesterday with a good drink and a carry-out meal, we both wanted a quiet anniversary this year and told the family just call around during the week if they want, it's pissing down with rain outside so staying indoors looked like a good choice.

Just sitting here relaxed drinking some wine and watching some movies etc and nibbling away on crisps and bits and pieces of nosh the wife laid out, this is the life, I won't try getting drunk today as I don't want to upset the wife and get a kick in the nuts, that's the normal thing that happens if I get drunk. :drunk:

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10 hours ago, CaaC (John) said:

I won't try getting drunk today as I don't want to upset the wife and get a kick in the nuts, that's the normal thing that happens if I get drunk. :drunk:

Last year's anniversary photo our daughter took, I gave the boss-eyed look because I had been drinking and a bit pissed, when the wife saw the photo I then got the normal kick in the nuts O.o

A.png

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3 hours ago, CaaC (John) said:

Last year's anniversary photo our daughter took, I gave the boss-eyed look because I had been drinking and a bit pissed, when the wife saw the photo I then got the normal kick in the nuts O.o

A.png

Happy Anniversary mate... 

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