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Bluewolf

Things we say all the time that are simply untrue...

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My two favorites have to be.. 

"Back in a minute" and "Hang on a sec"

My daughter has just gone to pick Leelah up from playgroup.. as she left she said "back in a minute" it's at least 20 minutes there and 30 minutes back with Leelah jumping in every puddle.. xD

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Motherfucker not a single person i know has ever done such an act

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1 minute ago, Azeem said:

Motherfucker not a single person i know has ever done such an act

If you are talking about your own Mum then probably not... what if it was someone else's Mum though?? 

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"I'm 5 minutes away" - Commonly used when I am actually yet to leave the house.

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Seeing someone call me and I purposely don't answer. 

I then text them straight after, "Hey I'm busy, what's up?" 

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Telling the taxi driver 

Anywhere here will do. 

Rather than actually pointing out my house and making him drive up to it.

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26 minutes ago, nudge said:

"I have read the Terms & Conditions".

 

Seriously though, "How are you?" - "I'm fine" is probably the biggest lie and the most pointless conversation ever. In fact most of small talk/common courtesy is... 

 

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On a phone conversation and you say 'see you later' when you don't plan to see them at all.

 

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A friend standing in the rain, soaked to the skin waiting on a bus or a taxi and with a face that could sink a thousand ships and you say "How is ya going mate, looking well?..."

Whoops  :eek:

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1 hour ago, nudge said:

Seriously though, "How are you?" - "I'm fine" is probably the biggest lie

At least when I say that to people I do it with some conviction, as if I actually mean it... if the missus seems a bit down I ask her how she is and it's followed by the normal "I'm fine" but it's cold and curt then it's normally followed up very quickly with "just hunky dory" and that little bit clues you up to the real situation.. xD

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Whoever starts sentences with 'I'm not racist...' xD

 

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10 minutes ago, Stan said:

Whoever starts sentences with 'I'm not racist...' xD

 

 

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"I'm fine" when someone asks "how are you", because you don't want to bother anyone with your problems, and you hate small-talk. At least in my case xD

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2 minutes ago, Tommy said:

"I'm fine" when someone asks "how are you", because you don't want to bother anyone with your problems, and you hate small-talk. At least in my case xD

 

3 hours ago, nudge said:

Seriously though, "How are you?" - "I'm fine" is probably the biggest lie and the most pointless conversation ever. In fact most of small talk/common courtesy is... 

 Haha. Great minds...

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Just now, nudge said:

 

 Haha. Great minds...

Oder "Zwei Blöde, ein Gedanke" :P

 

But yea, if you pass someone in the streets you just don't start talking about what's bothering you. I know a guy, when I meet him in the streets he starts talking about his family, his girlfriend, his flat or all that kind of stuff even though I didn't even ask anything. That's how I developed a great vision for what people I might run into from afar, so I can always correct the course and turn into another street or some alley. Or when I meet someone like that in a supermarket, I always stay in the last row of the supermarket until that person is at the checkout. Sometimes that makes my shopping trip 10-15 Minutes longer, but I successfully avoided small-talk, so it's still a win in my book :D

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1 hour ago, Tommy said:

That's how I developed a great vision for what people I might run into from afar, so I can always correct the course and turn into another street or some alley. 

If this happens where I see someone I may know but don't want to chat, it's where the phone comes out and there's a fake phone call or I pretend to be so engrossed in my phone and not notice them as I walk past them.

May sound rude but sometimes you just really can't be arsed to chat with people. 

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19 minutes ago, Stan said:

If this happens where I see someone I may know but don't want to chat, it's where the phone comes out and there's a fake phone call or I pretend to be so engrossed in my phone and not notice them as I walk past them.

May sound rude but sometimes you just really can't be arsed to chat with people. 

Don't do a fake phonecall as knowing my luck I'll forget it's on sound and get a call but I do the fake texting when I can't be arsed.

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6 minutes ago, Lucas said:

My missus in bed.

"Not tonight babe, I'm tired"

Then spends the next half hour on her phone Facebooking, Twittering and Instagraming.

Good one love. You could have done that for 28 minutes and let me have my 2 minutes at least. 

Was believable until you said 2 minutes. 

Think a lot of yourself with generous thinking like that ;)

 

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10 hours ago, Lucas said:

My missus in bed.

"Not tonight babe, I'm tired"

Then spends the next half hour on her phone Facebooking, Twittering and Instagraming.

Good one love. You could have done that for 28 minutes and let me have my 2 minutes at least. 

You are my hero. I bow to your sexual prowess and endurance. That's at least 6 times for me.

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13 hours ago, Cannabis said:

Don't do a fake phonecall as knowing my luck I'll forget it's on sound and get a call but I do the fake texting when I can't be arsed.

Wait, there are people who actually have their phones on sound? Astounding :o 

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32 minutes ago, Tommy said:

Wait, there are people who actually have their phones on sound? Astounding :o 

Sure thing, mine is set to Imperial March to keep everyone away.

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