SirBalon's: Knowing Men's Fashion Trends

[SirBalon]

2 minutes ago, Stan said:

 

i think you know

The story has to be made public or I will continue to play ignorance. 

[Rafa Beneathus]

Hi Balon.

Just an update for you buddy, boot cut jeans are still considered twatful.

Any questions do not hesitate in sending me a PM.

King regards

Any.

[Rick]

I saw some lad wearing a signet ring the other day. He looked a cock. It comes across as desperate. 

I take pride in my clothes, I like to look good and sometimes I'll even give up FULL comfort for something that looks good. That being said, some of the gear out there nowadays is poncey and shit. Like those ultra skinny jeans with a pair of sandals, or really really low cut muscle tops.  

[SirBalon]

 

The Best Raw Denim Guide You'll Ever Read

It’s painful, it’s expensive, it requires serious perseverance and if you’re not careful, it might just become something of an addiction. No, not bondage. This is something far less raunchy, yet every bit as daunting to attempt as a beginner. Welcome to the world of raw denim.

Just like quantum physics, Bitcoin and CrossFit, raw denim is something that you’ve almost certainly heard of, but probably still struggle to fully comprehend. And it’s no wonder. It’s probably the most difficult thing in menswear to wrap your head around – aside from perhaps Kanye West’s enduring status as a style icon.

You see, regular jeans don’t come with an instruction manual, but then regular jeans are just regular jeans. And if you’re the sort of guy who’s into denim trends or always striving to add that extra something to his look, a pair of beautifully worn raw denim jeans could be exactly what you never knew you needed.

What Is Raw Denim?

When you head down to the high street to pick up a new pair of jeans, the ones you take off the hanger will have been through more cosmetic procedures than an ageing Hollywood A-lister. They’ll have been dyed, washed, distressed, shrunk, stretched and all the rest of it, whereas raw denim is subjected to none of this bar the dyeing process. It’s taken straight off the loom (the machine on which the fabric is spun), sewn into something leg- or jacket-shaped and sold to you.

So why are you paying several times the price for something that has required less work? The answer is you’re not. Raw denim jeans are often made in small batches, by experienced hands, in high-cost labour countries like Japan and America. On top of that, they’re built to withstand a battering, using premium materials that far surpass the quality of their mass-market equivalents.

The other draws to raw are the fades and the fit. These jeans are stiff, dark and unforgiving at first, but over time they mould to the owner’s legs, loosen up and develop unique fade patterns in areas of wear (provided you don’t wash them too soon, but more on that later). These tend to include the backs of the knees (honeycombs), thighs (whiskers), the pockets where you keep your wallet/phone and where the denim stacks around the ankles.

“Raw denim enthusiasts appreciate high contrast fading that is achieved by rarely washing their denim,” explains David Giusti, a self-professed denimhead from Blackhorse Lane Ateliers, one of the UK’s finest jeans manufacturers. “This is to keep as much indigo on the garment as possible in low-wear areas, while also trying to wear as much indigo off of the garment in high-wear areas, creating high contrast.”

Raw Denim & Selvedge Denim: What’s The Difference?

Newcomers to the world of denim are often left flummoxed by the two main buzzwords: raw and selvedge. So let’s clear that up once and for all.

Raw denim, as explained above, is denim that hasn’t undergone any sort of washing or distressing processes, leaving it stiff and full of deep blue indigo dye.

Selvedge denim refers to the closed edges on denim that has been spun on a machine known as a shuttle loom. This is usually present as a white strip, visible when the jeans are cuffed or pinrolled, that gives a clean, finished look and prevents the material from unravelling. It’s more expensive to produce and is usually seen as a hallmark of quality denim.

The confusion occurs because raw denim often has a selvedge and vice versa. Although this is not always the case.

Sanforized Vs. Unsanforized

While raw denim in its truest form comes straight off the loom, a process called sanforization has become popular in recent years, which prevents the signature shrinkage that can make the process of buying raw jeans in the correct size almost as painful as wearing them for the first time.

“Sanforized denim goes through a process of being steamed and stretched that eliminates most of the shrinkage before the fabric is sewn into a pair of jeans,” explains Danny Hodgson, owner of London-based Rivet and Hide, a shop specialising in high-end denim. “Unsanforized is loom state: fresh off the loom and has not been through this process. Those of us of a certain age will know this as ‘shrink to fit’.”

Unsanforized denim will reduce in size by around 10 per cent so the jeans need a soak to eliminate the shrinkage before wear. This can be done by submerging them in a bathtub filled with lukewarm water for around 30 minutes. For extra crazy points, you can actually wear the jeans while sitting in the bath to ensure a perfect fit for your body type. Once that’s done, hang them outside in the sun by one of the belt loops to ensure they don’t lose their shape. But don’t forget to take them off first.

Picking the Right Size & Breaking In

All of these variables make picking out a pair of raw jeans that won’t leave you drowning in fabric or cut off your circulation notoriously tricky.

As a rule of thumb, if you’re opting for unsanforized then go up one size to accommodate shrinkage. For sanforized, the opposite is true. This type of denim will stretch a fair bit over the first few weeks of wear, mainly in the seat, waist and thighs, so if you like a snug fit you’ll want to take that into account.

Now the fun part. Breaking in raw denim isn’t the most pleasant of experiences. Imagine carrying out your day-to-day activities with your legs encased in cardboard and you’ll be halfway there. It’s so grim that A.P.C. even offers ‘Butler’ jeans, which have been broken in by someone else, prior to you buying them.

But stick it out. It may be difficult to believe at first but the same jeans that are making it almost impossible to get up and down stairs today will be the most comfortable pair you’ve ever owned in your life by the same time next year. It will pay off. Have faith. Don’t squat.

Blowouts: What Are They And How Can You Fix Them?

When you rock the same pair of jeans every single day and never give them a wash to soften them up, it’s inevitable that holes are going to crop up in areas of wear. The most common place for this to occur is at the crotch. Those in the know call this a ‘blowout’.

Blowouts occur when the excess fabric in the crotch of the jeans rubs against itself with each step. Over time, this forms a hole and if you’re new to raw denim, it can be pretty disheartening. But you can postpone it.

Although it’s not really an option early on if you’re on a quest for decent fades, Hodgson says that washing jeans occasionally will help to keep the denim soft, reducing the risk of a blowout. “And avoid riding a bike,” he adds. “That puts a lot of pressure on the crotch.” Blackhorse Lane’s Giusti concurs: “In the battle between a leather or plastic bike seat, and a pair of cotton jeans, the seat will always win.

Veteran denim nerds are well used to blowouts and see them as just another part of the raw denim experience. Every hole is an opportunity for a repair, which means another way to make your jeans slightly different from every other pair out there. Wear it like a badge of honour.

“Once the crotch shows signs of fraying, long before a blowout, get them reinforced with traditional darning or a patch sewn on the inside,” adds Hodgson. “This will really extend the life of the jeans. Blowouts are just part of the ageing process and cotton does wear out eventually.”

The best thing is to embrace it.

The Great Washing Debate

If you’re ever in need of some light entertainment, approach a group of denim nerds, ask them how and when it’s best to wash a pair of raw jeans, then sit back and watch the ensuing argument. The hotly-contended subject of washing is probably the most famous thing about raw denim. But is it really true that you shouldn’t wash your jeans? Well, yes and no is the answer.

For the vast majority of denim enthusiasts, the whole idea of going raw is to achieve bold, high-contrast fades. This is made possible by the excess dye in the fabric rubbing off over time. If you rinse the good stuff out before you’ve had time to break the jeans in properly, those whiskers and honeycombs just aren’t going to happen. Period.

At the same time, never washing your jeans can actually weaken the denim. “All of the sweat, oils and dirt that build up on one’s jeans effectively act as sandpaper, wearing down the cotton,” explains Giusti. “We recommend washing one’s jeans as little as you need to, but if they smell bad, you probably need to give them a wash.”

However, if you want those coveted high-contrast fades, you should wear them for a minimum of six months before they go anywhere near a wash. This will allow time for creases to form and dye to fade, meaning that when you do finally clean them, they’ll have lost colour in all the right places.

The Best Ways To Wash Raw Denim

So, when the time rolls around to de-funk your jeans, what are the best methods of denim care?

Freezer

Raw denim enthusiasts have a reputation for being a bit nutty. This stereotype is perpetuated by the fact that some of them like to store their legwear alongside their ice cream.

It may seem strange, but there is a logic behind it. During that initial six months to a year of continuous wear, jeans can develop a hum. Some think that putting them in the freezer will kill the odour-causing bacteria and keep them smelling fresh. But the actual science behind this is a little foggy.

Spot Cleaning

When you wear the same pair of jeans all the time, it’s inevitable that at some point they’re going to get sauce, a pint or some baby sick on them. The way to remedy this without a full wash is by spot cleaning.

Wet a cloth and dab the affected area, but don’t rub. You want to minimise how much of the dye you take off and scrubbing away like an angry maid is not going to help. Once dry, repeat again as needed.

Bathtub

When the time comes to finally wash your jeans, the bathtub method is the safest way to do it.

Fill the tub with lukewarm water, add a small amount of detergent (preferably a specialist product such as Woolite Black), then allow the jeans to soak for 30 minutes. Once you’ve done this, you can give them a gentle scrub to remove any dirt, then take them out and leave them to dry.

Washing Machine

For the most hardened of denim fanatics, putting a pair of jeans anywhere near a washing machines is an offence grave enough to see you stripped of your selvedge stripes. However, it can be done, as long as it’s handled carefully.

Using Woolite Black detergent and nothing else, place your jeans into a front-loading washing machine and use either the delicate or hand-wash setting. Make sure its cold too – you don’t want to risk any shrinkage.

Sea

Just when you thought things couldn’t get any more ridiculous. It may sound farfetched, but one method of washing favoured by some hardcore denimheads is to take your jeans for a dip in the sea.

The idea is to wear them, go for a paddle, come out, rub them with sand and then allow them to dry in the sun. Will it make your jeans look any better? Maybe. Are people likely to try and have you sectioned? Almost certainly.

[Spike]

I want a pair of raw denim jeans but they are too expensive for me right now. All that considering I have two fine pairs of jeans.

[SirBalon]

13 minutes ago, Spike said:

I want a pair of raw denim jeans but they are too expensive for me right now. All that considering I have two fine pairs of jeans.

Which jeans do you have?

Did you know there's a brilliant New York based denim brand called Mott & Bow that make some of the best jeans in the world and they're not all that expensive. But they don't make raw selvedge denim as of yet. All the same, they're top notch!

[Spike]

2 minutes ago, SirBalon said:

Which jeans do you have?

Did you know there's a brilliant New York based denim brand called Mott & Bow that make some of the best jeans in the world and they're not all that expensive. But they don't make raw selvedge denim as of yet. All the same, they're top notch!

I have a few pairs of Levis.

[SirBalon]

9 minutes ago, Spike said:

I have a few pairs of Levis.

Yeah, Levi's are great but for me they've become way too common as they've suddenly become what Lee were two summers back. People here in London are like sheep when it comes to fashion especially jeans.  I own various pairs but won't be buying any more until the sheep move onto a new brand.  But they are great, especially their vintage department which isn't cheap at all.

[Spike]

3 minutes ago, SirBalon said:

Yeah, Levi's are great but for me they've become way too common as they've suddenly become what Lee were two summers back. People here in London are like sheep when it comes to fashion especially jeans.  I own various pairs but won't be buying any more until the sheep move onto a new brand.  But they are great, especially their vintage department which isn't cheap at all.

I think everyone in America owns a pair of Levis. Less of a fashion statement, and more of a staple. 

[SirBalon]

5 minutes ago, Spike said:

I think everyone in America owns a pair of Levis. Less of a fashion statement, and more of a staple. 

That's the way it used to be here but sadly it has become a fashion statement for idiots that think they understand denim.

[Spike]

Just now, SirBalon said:

That's the way it used to be here but sadly it has become a fashion statement for idiots that think they understand denim.

Cheezus Christ, that is like saying 'I understand Spanish culture because I went to Ibiza'. 

[SirBalon]

The Best Men's Shorts Guide You'll Ever Read

Despite what our sweat-drenched calves tell us in the summer, transitioning to shorts can be a risky move. Too short and paired with a matching preppy blazer over a shirt and tie and you risk looking like it’s your first day of primary school. Anything below the knee and you risk looking like a talent show reject in the year 2000.

There are a number of unwavering rules on how and when to pull out the knee-caps and with the world of fashion stylishly catching up with our need for a bit of ventilation, there’s a temptation to flash some leg before summer starts in earnest. Resist if you can. Spring weather is changeable and the azure skies you leave home under are likely to bruise by the time you’re off the bus.

We all know it’s easy to remove layers if you’ve overcommitted; less so to add ones you’ve not brought with you. “Don’t dive in too early,” says Phil Green, global senior operations manager for Farfetch, who advises leaving it until at least mid-May before breaking out your shorts under British skies. Also check ahead on your plans for the day – wearing shorts in spring is an acceptance that you’ve got no after-dark al fresco plans.

The Perfect Fit

Over the last decade, shorts have got shorter. It’s traditional to lay the blame at Daniel Craig’s overexposed legs, ever since his Ursula Andress-esque stride from the sea in Casino Royale, sporting a pair of La Perla shorts that took their name a little too literally. But what’s suitable for James Bond on a Caribbean beach doesn’t translate well to a barbecue in Colchester.

“A length that grazes the bottom of the thigh is best,” says stylist Dan May, who has worked with the likes of David Beckham and Eddie Redmayne. “It’s the most flattering to any body shape and avoids cutting off the knee.” May also advocates a cuff at the bottom: “It offers the illusion of shortness without showing too much flesh.”

That low-thigh sweet spot is imperative even if you’re trying to cover up rather than show off. As with your upper half, acres of fabric only serve to draw the eye to precisely the thing you’re trying to divert attention from.

Even men with big thighs should opt for a slight taper to the knee, while the edges of your shorts shouldn’t extend beyond hip width, otherwise you risk boxiness that makes your calves appear puny in comparison. Ditto anything with cargo pockets – having things to carry is a problem easily solved by picking up a bag.

The Right Shorts For Every Occasion

It’s easy to style a pair of slim, dark jeans in the winter months. But as we swap the snow for sun, those bottoms will start creeping above your mankles and over your knees, creating opportunities for all manner of fashion faux pas. These are the shorts to wear for every occasion, and how you should style them. Unless you’re a wildlife documentarian, mountain boots need not apply.

Chino Shorts

The fallback style for picnics, barbecues and balmy nights out on the Med, chinos let you swerve heatstroke while also meeting the bouncer’s standards if you’re out after dark. “Chino shorts are ideal because they can be dressed up or down if there’s a tighter door policy,” says Kasia Katner, lead stylist at online styling service, Thread, “the best cut being just an inch or two above the knee.”

Team your cotton chino shorts with a classic Breton shirt and a navy blazer and finish off with a pair of loafers. That exclusive rooftop party beckons.

Tailored Shorts

If you’re confident that baring your calves won’t lead to a meeting with HR, this is the style to turn to Monday-to-Friday when the office temperature is set to ‘roast’. Try combining a pair with a neatly ironed shirt, expertly polished Derbies and a lightweight cotton or linen-blend blazer for a sophisticated look that would also work for a date or al fresco dining at an upmarket restaurant.

“Opt for minimal styles in pared-back, muted colours,” Katner advises, stressing the importance of a style that hits the sweet spot just above the knee. “It’s also best to avoid detailing like flap or zip pockets, and anything remotely sports-geared.”

Denim Shorts

As you start to spend more time in your pub’s beer garden than your own, it’s worth opting for a pair of hardwearing shorts that will withstand a few washes – because there will pint dribbles. And maybe even cigarette ash. Making knee-length denim options the way to go. Although not as breathable as their cotton and linen counterparts, denim shorts are durable and transition well to the evening. Better yet, a dark colour will hide most stains and combine well with a shirt come sundown.

Denim shorts have a knack for looking unkempt if styled incorrectly. So swerve the string vest and pair yours with care. Start with a simple slim-fitting tee, then layer a fine-gauge jumper or sweatshirt on top so your teeth don’t start chattering once the sun wanes.

Tread carefully, too. By which we mean it’s never okay to wear denim shorts with flip-flops. Running trainers can be tricky as well, so pull on a pair of canvas or leather low-tops and you’ll be in step with the rest of this low-key look.

Sports Shorts

Unless you’ve set up a sleeping bag somewhere between the leg press and the running machine, chances are you’ll wear your sweaty gym shorts outside the gym, too. Thanks to the era of athleisure though, it is lot easier to look fashionable as you do so. Opt for a subtle pair of sweat shorts (think logo-free jersey) in a versatile colour like black, grey or navy. Or lunge (not literally) towards a streetwear look with something heavily branded from the likes of Nike or Champion.

Keep the rest of your outfit on track by pulling on a crew neck T-shirt and bomber jacket or luxe hoodie. Similarly, neutral hues work well, but revving up the colour with one piece – either the tee or the jacket – can add some punch to this casual look.

Swim Shorts

Oddly – for a market that’s relatively small and seasonal – there’s an abundance of beach and poolside shorts choices for men. The simplest to wear are tailored styles in block colours and quick-drying fabrics that lend themselves to a post-dip lunch.

Cropped retro swimmers that are extra short in the leg have been in fashion for the last couple of years, but approach with caution and more than a couple of legs day sessions behind you. The same goes for bright, coruscating patterns. If you go bold below the waist, be sure everything above it is muted.

“Make sure whatever you do on top is simple, otherwise you can look a little try-hard,” says May. “Always make sure they’re dry and team with a polo shirt to make the transition effortless.”

The Best Shorts Brands

Reiss

Bridging the gap between high street and high end, this stylish British destination is known for timeless design-led fashion. The brand was a champion of the Cuban collar shirt, way before anyone else, and it has a fine range of shorts to go with this summer staple. While most other brands just offer shorts in cotton twill, Reiss has a line in linen, giving you more options for high-summer temperature fluctuations.

Orlebar Brown

Sounds like a long lost Spanish conquistador, is actually the biggest name in luxury swimwear. These shorts are almost too nice to muddy in chlorinated waters, going through the same level of tailoring as suit trousers in a range of exotic prints you’ll want to hang on your wall. Recently, the British brand has also expanded to encompass the rest of your sartorial needs, including some dashing cotton shorts.

Gap

It’s no surprise that the world’s first choice for chinos does an extensive range of shorts. Ordered by the length of the in-seam, you can choose how much thigh you want on show, and there’s just as broad a spectrum of colours. Also look out for reliable, affordable, laid-back denim styles.

Ralph Lauren

Ralph Lauren, along with Calvin Klein, resuscitated US fashion in the 1970s, with a range of preppy staples (knitwear, chinos, polos) evacuated from the campus library and onto the beaches of Cannes. Lauren describes his fashion as an American visualisation of Europe in the 1930s, so think what F. Scott Fitzgerald would strut around in if he was allowed to show a bit of knee and you’d be close to the mark.

Available in a range of fits (relaxed, classic fit, stretched slim) and bold colours and patterns, Ralph Lauren probably offers the best range of shorts off the high street.

Topman

The high-street monolith has a reputation for being able to pre-empt the latest catwalk looks without the need to rob a bank to refit out your wardrobe. When it comes to shorts they have one of the most varied selections out there. Alongside evergreen chino styles, this is a good place to come to try more niche trends without spending a fortune.

Frescobol Carioca

Who is this Frescobol Carioca? Some sort of perma-tanned, fabulously flamboyant European designer who makes the finest tailored swim shorts somewhere on the Atlantic coast? Err no, it’s two British stockbrokers who, thanks to some sort of major DNA mix-up in the fashion lab, happen to make luxury beachwear that embodies the carnival spirit of Rio de Janeiro. Who cares where it came from, just appreciate the vivid mosaic patterns and tailored precision.

Gucci

While the shorts market can be a little overwhelmed by a-tad-too-beige options, don’t expect that from Gucci. Its ever-increasing popularity with social media-hungry millennials is precisely because its garments garner Instagram likes. As items of clothing, they always look better as a standalone statement so anchor with plain pieces that neutralise the extravagance.

Marks & Spencer

While the grand old duke of the British high street still does more than a few pairs of dad-friendly cargo shorts and even one or two three-quarter-length horrors, its huge range of shorts also includes some gems. Its tailored chino styles are some of the best value you’ll find anywhere.

Scotch & Soda

The favourite tipple of Ernest Hemingway, we’d like to think the legendary writer would extend his scotch and soda loving ways to the Dutch brand of the same name. Renowned for its progressive style, the label’s shorts offer a slightly more relaxed fit than the buttoned-up, more tailored names on this list, as well as hippy-ish designs that would suit an upmarket gap year.

A brand that flies under the radar, there’s little chance of being caught twinning with that guy from HR by the work photocopier.

Sunspel

The Sunspel philosophy is rather simple: make exceptional, everyday clothing from beautiful fabrics. As such, expect pure lightweight cotton shorts from the British heritage brand with a garment dye (rather than stitching together pre-dyed fabrics, the entire garment is soaked in colour). This softens the shorts and gives them a lived-in feel. Colour and pattern wise, this is not Gucci or Orlebar Brown, but for understated British gent abroad you can’t go far wrong with a Sunspel basic.

Oliver Spencer

If ever there was such a thing as relaxed formalwear it exists in the mind of Oliver Spencer. The designer set up his eponymous brand a little over 15 years ago and it has risen to the top of the British menswear pile with quality tailoring, minus the stuffiness.

In terms of colour, pink hues reign, as do stripes. Short shorts are unwelcome, the Oliver Spencer cut is just above the knee, while linen and jersey are the favoured fabrics for a comfortable fit with zero pretence.

Ted Baker

Ted Baker is the king of surprise. Think you’re getting plain old chino shorts? Bam, there’s a paisley trim underneath to feast your eyes on. It’s the Ted way – a classic shape and fit hiding some marvellous peacocking finishing touch. The short range tends to be a playful take on the chino style, with a slimmer taper than preppy alternatives, while the colours range from playing it dangerously safe to rich and sumptuous.

Selected Homme

From the Danish clothing company Bestseller, which also houses Jack & Jones, Selected Homme differs from its stablemate’s vintage-inspired Americana with a minimal Scandinavian take on menswear. Readily available at Topman, ASOS and John Lewis amongst others, the brand’s printed shorts are minimal and tasteful while the majority of the range is block-coloured with a few striped pairs popping up.

You’ll get 100 per cent cotton at prices that leave plenty of change for a last-minute vacation.

 

[Azeem]

@SirBalon Any good underwears you recommend ?

P.S Please don't say Cristiano's 

[Tommy]

I buy my shorts at Aldi or C&A and they don't look worse than the overpriced branded crap pictured above. 

[SirBalon]

6 hours ago, Tommy said:

I buy my shorts at Aldi or C&A and they don't look worse than the overpriced branded crap pictured above. 

I look good in photos too. 

[Panna King]

On 19/02/2018 at 08:21, SirBalon said:

The Best Dressed Football Managers

 

There’s a great anecdote in issue 17 of football quarterly The Blizzard about how Malcolm ‘Big Mal’ Allison, famed for his trademark fedora and fur coat, was upstaged – as Sporting Lisbon manager in the 1982 Portuguese Cup final – by his opposite number, Sporting Braga coach Quinito, who wore a tuxedo for the occasion.

Sadly, this sort of flex is the exception rather than the rule. Aside from a few ‘antihero pieces’ – Arsène Wenger’s bin bag coat, Tim Sherwood’s gilet, Tony Pulis’ magic hat – the touchline barely attracts any style commentary worth speaking about. There’s about as much panache on display as in the average Sam Allardyce side.

There are a few bosses, however, who make the beautiful game look good. To paraphrase Brian Clough, we wouldn’t say these are the best-dressed managers in the business – but they are in the top five.

 

PEP GUARDIOLA

Guardiola’s swag is often spoken of in terms more breathless than Brazilian Ronaldo on the first day of pre-season training. But like his management style, Pep’s wardrobe is not beyond reproach.

His suits can be on the shiny side, and he frequently teams them with a belt, which is a yellow card offence in our book. (It saws you in half visually: besides, if you need a belt, then your suit doesn’t fit properly.)

That said, the Spaniard is indisputably a top, top, top managerial dresser. His tonal tailoring game is generally strong, as is his knitwear (including the odd roll neck). He’s no slouch in casualwear, either, and he’s even pulled off short-sleeved shirts.

The tactic: Keep it fairly tight

No, we’re not talking about his porous defences. The main reason that Guardiola is in another league to his rivals is because his clothes, particularly his suits, are close-fitting.

Occasionally a little too close: in the return leg of a Champions League quarter-final, he ripped his trousers on the touchline. There’s no movement, lads!

 

ROBERTO MANCINI

Ageing like a fine Barolo, oozing sprezzatura, Mancini is one of those well-dressed mature Italian men who would look as at home on The Sartorialist as in the dugout. You half-expect to see street style photographer Tommy Ton crouched pitchside trying to get a details shot.

When he was at Man City, Mancini became synonymous with his retro striped scarf – a free gift for season-ticket holders – wearing it with such trend-setting urbanity that the club made it available for general purchase by popular demand. But his key accessory only diverted attention from the rest of his outfits, which were typically immaculate.

As ‘il boss’ of Lazio, Mancini supposedly instructed the players to wear white shirts with their suits instead of blue, because he felt the former were more elegant. Bene.

The tactic: Don't always buy the big names

Mancini is a fan of Giorgio Armani, rightly declaring his compatriot one of the best designers in history. But he gets his suits from his own “small” tailor in Naples.

As Leicester have demonstrated, you don’t need to splash out on stars to have a competitive dressing room.

 

ZINEDINE ZIDANE

The current holder of the bucking bronco that is the Real Madrid hot-saddle, Zizou is relatively new to management but no stranger to fashion. The talented former midfield maestro has previously modelled for Louis Vuitton, adidas Y-3 and Mango.

Zidane’s coaching CV is considerably less filled out, but he certainly looks the part. He’s also that rare guy who can wear sportswear beyond his twenties without resembling mutton dressed as ram.

Like all of the entrants on this list, it helps that Zidane – at 43, the youngest – gives the svelte impression that he could still join in with the five-a-side match at the end of training.

The tactic: Play with your head

The most striking thing about Zidane is clear enough. (Just ask Marco Materazzi.) Yes, his baldness is an asset, but it’s one he assists by sticking to understated pieces and subdued colours. Whether in a suit or a tracksuit, his palette doesn’t distract from his pate.

Ultimately, your face should be noticed before your outfit. If your kit is so garish that it hogs the headlines, then you need to make a substitution.

 

LUIS ENRIQUE

With Guardiola as his near-predecessor at Barcelona, the Spaniard had big shoes to fill. Or in his case, trainers worn with a suit.

Forever the ultimate utility man to a generation of Champ Man players (SW/D/M/F Reuben Loftus-Cheek FTW), Enrique has proved just as versatile with his personal style. He got unfairly trolled by football fans and pundits when Barça played Arsenal at the Emirates for his Replay parka and old-school adidas kicks in matching military green. Which is a bit like a half-time team-talk from Karl Lagerfeld: not worth listening to.

The tactic: Get your foot on the ball

Enrique gives a masterclass in getting the trainers with a suit thing right: keep the kicks classic and/or minimal, and the tailoring trim.

(On a separate but tangentially related note, can we take a moment to talk about the fact that Barcelona’s pre-game outfit is double denim [courtesy of their contract with Replay])?

 

QUÍQUE SÁNCHEZ FLORES

Like a Mediterranean version of Hugh Laurie in House, the ex-Watford gaffer seems as likely to impart tactical information to his skipper Troy Deeney as grumpily diagnose him with some obscure condition.

While not as much of a household name as the others on this list, Flores is seriously underrated. He rocked up for his introduction to the British press (now at Espanyol) in a slim suit, button-down shirt and canvas trainers. As former Gunners hitman Ian Wright (who is actually pretty sharp – maybe we should do best-dressed pundits) put it: “Cool persona, cool trainers… with José struggling, he could be the new sheriff in town.”

The tactic: Adopt a less rigid formation

It’s not just diving and actually being good at football that continental fancy Dans have imported to these shores. They’ve also brought relaxed, soft-shouldered tailoring that looks and feels less stuffy, so much so that you can wear it with a T-shirt.

There’s a time and a place for highly constructed suits but, unless you’re at a wedding, it’s not the weekend. Take a leaf from Flores’ book with blazers that are more like cardigans – and in some cases, cardigans instead of blazers – and take a bow, son.

 

Source: Jamie Millar (fashion writer)

Martin Jol and Tony Pulis piss all over them!  Only these 2 can pull off a suit and a baseball cap!

[Rick]

@SirBalon what do you think of the current trend of streetwear? The likes of Supreme, Champion, Bape, Off-White & Palace seem to all be blowing up big time thanks to this new 'hypebeast' movement. I remember when I used to be able to get a supreme t-shirt for £20...now it's ten times that amount. 

[SirBalon]

1 hour ago, Mantis Toboggan M.D. said:

@SirBalon what do you think of the current trend of streetwear? The likes of Supreme, Champion, Bape, Off-White & Palace seem to all be blowing up big time thanks to this new 'hypebeast' movement. I remember when I used to be able to get a supreme t-shirt for £20...now it's ten times that amount. 

Yeah, I also remember when Champion had lost its way in Europe and became pretty cheap.  Go into their website now and check out their prices! The same can be said of Kappa with their Kontroll selection... Not cheap at all but if you compare it to their run of the mill sports wear the price difference is astronomical.

Whats happened is that certain style gurus in the fashion industry (3 years ago) added a lot of street wear in their runway collections.  I'm talking about the New York, Milan, Paris, London and Barcelona main fashion shows.  It was predominant by partnering with a few of the ones you've mentioned, also Adidas, and changing designs slightly... The same thing has happened with Kappa like I've just said.  Off-White is a very good example! Fila have gone the same way as the re-emergence of Ellesse.

Personally I love it!  I've always thought over the years that  more of an effort was made by the sporting side of fashion brands, then the combination of quality casual clothing with quality sport casual would be great and that's the way it's going. 

Mu only negative with it is that I have an inkling it's a fad which would be sad.

[Rick]

@SirBalon

Yep, I also love it. Don't get me wrong, I think some of the stuff made my certain companies (off-white & supreme in particular) is purely cater towards the obsessed collectors. That being said, the likes of Champion are coming out with some really nice sweatshirts in a variation of subtle colours, and then as you say the likes of Kappa and Fila coming back strong with their own street wear lines.

They're nice, slightly more affordable (than the higher end brands) alternative for daily wear. I've got couple of Champion sweaters and I intend to pick up a few more. 

[SirBalon]

The best (and worst) kits from the 2018 World Cup

Get set to crack out the gaudy memorabilia and dust down your ear piercing vuvuzela, it’s football World Cup time and boy are we excited for the Sunday afternoons roasting like a suckling pig in the pub garden sun as a dimly lit projector beams Japan versus Senegal onto a garden shed.

This coming World Cup has coincided with a rising interest in football kits, and more specifically classic football shirts from the 1980s and 1990s with retro geometric designs becoming as prevalent to the streetwear crowd as the various teams playing in Russia this summer.

“Classic shirts are great for business-as-usual league games, but this historic sporting event calls for a major dollop of flamboyance,” says Simon Doonan, creative ambassador-at-large of New York City-based clothing store Barneys and author of Saturday Night Fever Pitch: The Magic and Madness of Football Style. “Throwing a player into a tasteful solid shirt in a spiffy color is simply not enough.”

According to Doonan Argentina’s winning vertical blue and white stripes shirt from 1978 is a prime example of a World Cup shirt done right. “Vertical stripes – especially like the historic black and white classic shirts of Newcastle and Juventus – never fail to make players appear invincible, and most important, slender.”

To mark the occasion of this coming World Cup we have decided to rank the kits from the World Cup from best to worst, with Doonan by our side as our resident football shirt pundit.

Belgium

The country that gave us French fries (confusingly) and waffles, much to the chagrin of our waistlines, has now given us quite possibly the most beautiful football shirt in the history of the game. From the elegant royal crest placed bang in the middle to the understated 1980s-influenced geometric pattern and the bold rouge, this is simply majestic.

Doonan points out that the emblazoned pattern is very similar to the Scottish argyle diamond, mentioning its place in footballing history: “The Argyle recalls the era – back in the last century – when footballing casuals adopted the argyle pattern as an FU to the golfing upper-classes. It’s fabulous.”

Germany

A clear nod to the kit worn by West Germany on the way to winning their third World Cup in 1990, the legendary backstory (cue epic violin solo) only serves to amplify the greatness of this Adidas design. It doesn’t play too heavily on the 1990s maximalism fortunately with the busy pattern across the chest contrasting superbly with the minimalism down below.

Argentina

Rounding out the top three is another effort by Adidas, which really is the king of the football kit making game. The bold sky blue and white stripes has always been a sweeping fashion statement, and here it’s completed with the Adidas three stripes across the shoulder. Like Belgium, it helps that Argentina have a regal emblem but the classy design is still the real winner here.

France

Nike has chosen to base all its 2018 World Cup kits on their Aeroswift template, but the French shirt stands out from the others because of the inclusion of the single button just underneath the collar which makes it look like a Henley shirt, and not a tube of sausage casing you’re required to squeeze your sweaty body out of after matches.

Russia

Similar to the classic Manchester United kits of the 1980s, this shirt is a testament to Russian modesty but all the better for the white lines bolting across the sleeves like Putin riding bareback through Siberian hinterland. The red also has a juicy vibrancy about it – a worthy kit to play in for the hosts of the tournament.

Mexico

Like the 8-bit version of that vase/two people kissing conundrum, the side panels on Mexico’s strip add to the retro look rather than distract. The deep green reminds us of Christmas (or maybe the Mexican flag – funny that) while the white accents, especially the thin trim around the collar, serve to clean up what is a very tidy kit.

Colombia

Adidas – you’re killing us at the moment. There’s something quite David Bowie in the dynamic blue and red zig-zags down the side, while the wrap over collar is a nice little retro touch that doesn’t overshadow the discombobulating shade of yellow. “The Aladdin Sane glam-rock lightening bolts appear to be erupting from the players armpits,” says Doonan. “What better way to intimidate your opponent than by suggesting that your lymph nodes have special powers?”

Croatia

The Croatian football strip has always caused consternation – whether it’s a checkmate all depends on your love of picnic blankets. Regardless, Doonan is a fan: “The checkered pattern is bold and memorable while the away colour combo – grey and black – recalls the Louis Vuitton ‘Daumier’ pattern.”

Portugal

A fairly simple design, the jagged icicles on the French shirt are copied here but you’d need a magnifying glass to spot them. So while the main attraction of this Nike template is hiding in plain sight, all we have to admire are the colours. Good thing they’re pretty ones, with a brusque red as rich as port and the surprising pulling off of red and green which we only thought carol singers could rock.

Brazil

Yes, it’s another lazy kit design from Nike who seem to be focusing on the performance qualities of their football shirts as opposed to how they look, but the Brazil colours really don’t need much interference. Utilising the colours of the scorching sand and the tropical palm trees – nothing symbolises the samba boys better.

Japan

The more we squint at this shirt the more it starts to resemble a birds eye view of the M25, but it’s still a stylish design that we could imagine working with a bit of athleisure. (Apparently it’s meant to resemble an ancient Japanese stitching technique called Sashiko.) Whatever it is, it contrasts well with the plain blue sleeves and the little red accents around the collar.

Australia

Australia is a wild country filled with humongous creepy crawlies and cans of lukewarm Fosters, and yet now the most wild thing in the whole nation are those green veins popping out of this shirt’s sleeves. Shockingly it works, mainly because the green is a deep, luxurious hue and gold is such a winning colour.

Egypt

A little simple, granted, but red and black is a killer pairing in all walks of fashion. The trim also extends beyond the collar and onto the hem of the sleeves which is a step further than some other snore-fest showings at the tournament.

Denmark

X marks the sport for the Danish in this World Cup. Despite resembling a team shirt for Wolverine and co. there’s enough to love in this shirt from the contrasting raglan sleeves, to the arrows sloping down the shoulder which makes a change from the Adidas three stripes smothered across most of the other shirts in the competition.

England

As a nation England has become used to underwhelming performances at international football tournaments, so it is only fitting that our disappointing form is echoed in the football kit. It’s not bad, just unnervingly safe. The only embellishment is a thin red line around the collar, which some might call minimalist, but is so boringly fine it should come with its own PG rating.

Senegal

It’s a bold move to just slam a massive lion right in the middle of your kit, and the Senegalese kit has a Versace feel in all those intricate spirals and squiggles. Also, green and white are a beautiful pairing, but maybe the green could have been a little darker? Just a suggestion for next time, Puma.

Poland

Look we like grey when its bold and knows what it wants to be. But all this faded grey on white shirts just makes it look like it needs another run in the washing machine. Having said that, the red trim on the collar is dynamic and punchy, and Poland has a powerful emblem that helps the shirt stand out.

Switzerland

Switzerland – makers of great watches; football kits, not so much. “Loving the wood-grainy squiggles,” says Doonan. “But what is with the strange faded band across the upper chest. This odd design decision makes it look like every player is wearing a darker red bustier top.” A great look for in the bedroom; on the football pitch, not so much.

Iceland

Why has Iceland skinned a snake and wrapped it around what is meant to be a football shirt sleeve. They’ve not even cleaned it, preferring to leave the blood splatters dribbling down onto the grassy field, like a threatening viking warrior bellowing “remember the Euros” at Harry Kane dressed as St George. The rest of the kit is a nice shade of icy blue though.

Peru

“I love Peru, the country,” admits Doonan. “My husband, the designer Jonathan Adler, gets lots of his pots and pillows fabricated there. So it pains me greatly to throw shade at the Peruvian shirt. The problem is that diagonal stripe is very treacherous. You think it’s going to add the gravitas of an ambassadorial sash, but all its does is exaggerate the area below the stripe and – horror of horrors – create the illusion of a beer belly.”

Panama

This will be the first World Cup for Panama, but unfortunately they’ll be entering the tournament in a kit that looks like it is covered in Lego bricks. It doesn’t even cover the whole shirt, with a bare patched V-shape circumventing the midriff. The neck saves the day somewhat with a shape similar to a Grandad collar.

Sweden

Sweden has foolishly left its football shirt on the Ikea griddle for too long and the grooves have left unsightly diagonal marks up and down their kit. If you’re going to do stripes just do them, none of this messing around with borderline translucent lines. The colour is also treading a fine day-glo line and making us feel a little queasy for it.

Spain

Oh dear, arguably one of the best teams in the tournament goes in to the World Cup in one of the worst kits. “Call me obsessive compulsive, but I will never be able to come to terms with the fact that the ziggy zaggy folkloric design motif only adorns one side of the body,” says Doonan. “Remember – symmetry, symmetry, symmetry.”

Costa Rica

This kit looks like a child has gone to town with a protractor and compass on your nice new rug. To make matters worse there seems to be faint vertical stripes running up the shirt like an enraged maths teacher reversing over road kill. It’s a nice rounded collar though.

Tunisia

Very similar to the Eygpt kit in the contrasting trim on the sleeves and collar, but white is too plain a colour for you to play it safe and classic. There’s also a strange dotty zig zag down the side panels, which has absolutely no idea what it’s doing or what it wants to be – kind of like us before our Monday morning coffee.

Uruguay

We understand that maximalism is coming back into sport kit design (and back out the other side if you look at the England strip) but the supposed sun on this kit doesn’t even look like the one on the Uruguayan flag, or the one in the sky for that matter. In fashion terms, the V-neck is also out after a brief return last year so we can’t even applaud that. A poor showing from the South Americans.

[Panna King]

@SirBalon are you in charge of the advertising on the site? this just came up on my screen 

 

[SirBalon]

7 minutes ago, Panna King said:

@SirBalon are you in charge of the advertising on the site? this just came up on my screen 

 

That comes up on my screej from time to time too with other similar types of clothing. Mental! 

[Panna King]

Just now, SirBalon said:

That comes up on my screej from time to time too with other similar types of clothing. Mental! 

Looks like it was designed in a Delux warehouse! 

[Spike]

On 5/19/2018 at 09:56, Cannabis said:

Calvin Klein is the way to go. £50 for a decent pair but so worth it, won't wear anything else now.

WHAT THE FUCK
I can buy about 6 for $20 in USA.

[Spike]

On 6/4/2018 at 03:40, SirBalon said:

Australia

Australia is a wild country filled with humongous creepy crawlies and cans of lukewarm Fosters, and yet now the most wild thing in the whole nation are those green veins popping out of this shirt’s sleeves. Shockingly it works, mainly because the green is a deep, luxurious hue and gold is such a winning colour.

 

We don't drink Fosters anymore ya silly prick. It's brewed in London FFS.

On 6/4/2018 at 03:40, SirBalon said:

Spain

Oh dear, arguably one of the best teams in the tournament goes in to the World Cup in one of the worst kits. “Call me obsessive compulsive, but I will never be able to come to terms with the fact that the ziggy zaggy folkloric design motif only adorns one side of the body,” says Doonan. “Remember – symmetry, symmetry, symmetry.”

 

 

Unironically the best kit of the tournament.  How the Spanish kit get's stick of asymmetry and not the German one, I'll never know.