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It's that time of year again...


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Posted

By popular demand, the dick willie himself is here to make the bundesliga relegation process crystal clear!!

So who's floating like butterflies, and who's getting stung by killer bees. Really impoverished low quality ones at that

This week...

 

VW got beaten up by a can of soda. There's probably a carbon emissions based joke in there as well. As 4-1 losers Wolfsburg are in deep deep ocelot shit.

Bayern Munich were reasonably gentle in their 3-1 demoition of Koln.

Frankfurt were less gentle, winning 3-0 to Hamburger (it's finally happening!!!!)

Mainz WON!!! Away as well! 2-1 win in Dortmund. Dortmund are less killer bees, and more the retarded bee than headbutts your window til it dies. No wonder they're going extinct

Borussia were MonchenGLADbach that they beat Freiburg 3-1. I'll see myself out.

 

THE TABLE AS IT STANDS!!!!!

 

Mainz. 36pts -13 GD.

Freiburg. 33pts -26 GD

Wolfsburg. 30pts -15 GD

Hamburger. 28pts -25 GD

Koln. 22pts -32 GD

 

Technically Koln are bonned

Next week...

 

Wolfsburg VS Koln.  Huge chance for Wolfsburg

Hamburger VS Monchengladbach. Must win for the Dinosaurs especially as Wolfsburg are playing a game as strong favorites

Mainz vs Bremen. Mainz will have a lot of wind in their sails. If Hamburg lose Mainz can;t be auto relegated, but no one wants to have to play the extra 2 games...

Freiburg vs Augsburg. Pretty much a must win for Freiburg to keep their necks above water.

 

Now we watch and wait.

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Posted
6 hours ago, Devil-Dick Willie said:

Technically Koln can stay in by winning all their games by a large margin and praying to dear sweet baby jesus. It's not happening tho.

There's only one game left :ph34r:

Posted
On 5/7/2018 at 10:39, Chadwell said:

I legitimately love these threads so much haha.

HSV to survive.

They've never been relegated right? 

Posted
9 hours ago, Spike said:

They've never been relegated right? 

Correct. They even have that annoying clock in the stadium that counts the time that HSV have spent in the Bundesliga so far, haha. Well, for one more match anyway :ph34r:

Posted
2 hours ago, Spike said:

Really?

Only partially, hehe. VW did decrease Wolfsburg's budget a while ago, and it looks like they are reevaluating their involvement with the club further (I think there's been changes in VW's top management recently that might have direct consequences for VfL), but to be fair, they have been underperforming for quite a while now. Even with the decrease in funds they still have more resources than most of other clubs in the league, they're just very poorly run and their squad building has been atrocious, in my opinion.

Posted

Okay, so lets wrap this up like I wrap up my doodle before I bone a single mum from campbell town.

 

Mainz. Lost. But they were never in danger anyway. I am a spud

Freiburg won 2-0!!!! They got the business done under pressure and as a result, they are SAFE!!!

Wolfsburg won very convincingly over Koln. As a result they secured the play off spot and secured the goats demise, which also means...

Hamburg are DOWN!!!! In spite of their victory Get rekt. 2af8f40f8f80bed09bc21682ee892d8d.gif

 

Wolfsburg will annihilate Holstein Kiel in our playoff, and welcome back to the bundesliga Nurnberg and 4 tunas.

 

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