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Question a Member: SirBalon

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  • What's your most embarrassing moment in your life where you thought "Please lord bury me"... Tell all!
  • For whatever reason (an important one maybe), have you ever had to be a hypocrite and pretend to like someone or agree with something you are against.
  • Have you ever cheated on your (or a) partner?
  • Apart from Barcelona or Arsenal...  What's the most excited you have ever been in a football match where you went unusually mental?
  • If you were to move away from England, where would be your favoured place to go and live?
  • If you could change something about the area and people where you live, what would it be?
  • Do you have a phobia, if so what is it?
  • If reincarnation exists and you couldn't come back as a human being but could choose what to return as, what would it be?
  • Have you ever envied someone, if yes, why and whom?
  • Even if totally out of the ordinary (or it may not be out of the ordinary), what would be your dream job or maybe owning some sort of business...  Tell us about your thoughts on that.
  • If you wasn't you, but you were introduced to you and due to shared friends you suddenly started to see more of you...  What would be your thoughts on you and would you make a close friendship with you?  In total...  What would be the resume you think others that know you, think. 
  • Who's your favourite player of all time?

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Favourite Peruvian player of all time?

How much do you know of Peruvian football, specifically in our golden generation?

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Did you ever get bashed in school for being a foreign poof?

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5 hours ago, Anton said:
  • What's your most embarrassing moment in your life where you thought "Please lord bury me"... Tell all!

There's actually a few embarrassing moments that can be considered potentially lethal in my life.  But the one that sticks out the most was on my 30th birthday where my friends organised a "surprise" party for me which was meant to have been leaked and I found out from a second party (she was in on it) and I got tricked.

What happened was that (the person that leaked it) I was told that the party would be in Mezzo Bar in Dean Street (Soho, London)  and that it would be a fancy dress type party...  That they weren't going to tell me and that I'd be the only one dressed normally.  The theme was 'the army' (I thanked her) bought myself a an American Naval uniform (like the one in An Officer & A Gentleman "the white one").

To cut a long story short...  The REAL party was in the next road (Frith Street, Soho) at a place called Little Italy (a small Italian restaurant that turns into a nightclub late nights).

I arrive at "Mezzo" and proceed to go downstairs (a big glass staircase where you are the focus of attention) and instead of finding my mates down there, I find instead a congregation of about 200 homosexual men that were doing their annual 'Gay Pride' get together.  Just to say that the homosexual get together wasn't even a fancy dress event either.  I had been followed by a bunch of my mates who followed me into this Mezzo place about a couple of minutes later. :$

  • For whatever reason (an important one maybe), have you ever had to be a hypocrite and pretend to like someone or agree with something you are against.

At work...  Many times and I would expect this is where it's happened to most people if at all.  The worst moment lasted about 8 months (about 5 years ago) where the most hated person (a department manager) in the company was put with me for 8 months to be trained on different modules.  Because of the length of time that person would be with me I had to "pretend" to like the person because otherwise I wouldn't be able to handle the situation.  That person was horrible...  A bigot, a xenophobe and didn't like homosexuals too much either...  He had them all to be honest, but he kept his "talents" to himself at work and I had to listen to that crap for 8 months.

  • Have you ever cheated on your (or a) partner?

Unfortunately yes!  Only once...  (because short spells with girls in my early 20s I don't count).  I was with a girl for 14 years and there was a spell where  I was teaching English in Spain where unfortunately I got entwined into a passionate short lived adventure with one of my students who was 19.  Not proud of it and to be honest even today, married to someone else and as a father I still think about that moment and what I done with massive sentiments of guilt and of hatred to myself.

  • Apart from Barcelona or Arsenal...  What's the most excited you have ever been in a football match where you went unusually mental?

You haven't included Spain or England...  I'll leave them both out though.  I go mental watching most football matches even if it isn't a team I have any sympathies toward.  But the most excited was when Argentina won the World Cup in 1986...  Maradona was the representation of God upon the earth for me as a kid and watching him win that final against West Germany was for me the proof he was God and it was like the final ascension of Christ into heaven where everything becomes clear.

  • If you were to move away from England, where would be your favoured place to go and live?

Well I've already done a 10 year stint outside England which was in Spain (Valencia).  I would move to either Spain or Italy to live without thinking twice (I may infact do it soon anyway)...  Apart from those two countries, New York (I see New York as a country within the US) would be my other favoured place.  I just LOVE that city!

  • If you could change something about the area and people where you live, what would it be?

There is indeed something I would change...  I live in Islington and the particular area I live in (Highbury) which is practically connected to an area called The Angel (Upper Street) has been gentrified (since over 25 years) to such an extent that we now have an acute situation of "haves and have nots".  I dislike many of the types that have moved to the area with money and how the local council is building properties only for those that have.  Remember that my council is run by none other than Mr Jeremy Corbyn!  This is why I hate politics and all those that spurt their doctrine on who's all good or who's all bad.

  • Do you have a phobia, if so what is it?

All insects, but Spiders bring out a side to me that is completely psychotic.  I lose all sense of normality and self control...  If anyone is near me when I see a spider, they'll probably get struck by me in my attempt to annihilate the creature in the most brutal of fashions.  I am the spider terrorist...  Anywhere I see them I attack them!  I'm not scared of snakes or any other animal, but those horrible creatures are the bane of my abnormal and obsessive side to me.

  • If reincarnation exists and you couldn't come back as a human being but could choose what to return as, what would it be?

An eagle...  I've always loved that animal and everything about it.  Majestic and celestial!

  • Have you ever envied someone, if yes, why and whom?

(I'm not that way inclined but I know many are which fascinates me) I've never envied anyone for what they have (possess) in terms of material objects.  But I have felt envy...  I've felt envy (the good kind) of people with absolutely NOTHING whatsoever in obscene poverty where they're as happy as you can get because they haven't been afflicted with what our society in the West has become.  I think you all know what I mean with that!

  • Even if totally out of the ordinary (or it may not be out of the ordinary), what would be your dream job or maybe owning some sort of business...  Tell us about your thoughts on that.

Because of my love affair with football, my utter passion for the sport, I always wanted to have a job connected with the sport.  Obviously as a kid I wanted to be a footballer...  I was very good at it too when I was a child! :D

But these days in this crazy world that politics has become I'd love to be a prime minister or president of an influential country.  I would be very vocal in how I think!

  • If you wasn't you, but you were introduced to you and due to shared friends you suddenly started to see more of you...  What would be your thoughts on you and would you make a close friendship with you?  In total...  What would be the resume you think others that know you, think. 

There are two sides to me!  So it depends the side that's more prominent at that moment...  I can be absolutely mental and "funny" when in the mood but then I have another side to me that's very serious and formal...  Almost analytical in the way I observe people (overly) which leads people to act according to what I'm displaying (obviously).  People that have known me for years love me but new people that meet me don't know how to take me at first.

  • Who's your favourite player of all time?

Diego Armando Maradona....  The undisputed greatest footballer of all time.  He is above the rest, he is God (in football terms).  Put it this way...  Would Lionel Messi have made Napoli do what they did under Maradona?  Messi has been part of a golden generation of players at the club he's played the whole of his professional career.  But without a doubt Messi is the next greatest thing and I would say he's the Messiah, God's son which means he is also God himself...  You know!  The Holy Trinity and all that confusing stuff!!! ;)

Then there's Alfredo di Stéfano who was "The Beginning", The Genesis. B|

 

Edited by SirBalon

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5 hours ago, LaSambadeStGermain said:

Favourite Peruvian player of all time?

How much do you know of Peruvian football, specifically in our golden generation?

Teófilo Cubillas who is one of the greats!  He is for me on the pantheon of those names that are written in Valhalla...  A hero!

Hugo Sotil for obvious reasons is another player that I adore not only because he was a great footballer but also because of the amazing human aspect to his character.

I know quite a lot about your golden generation as it's as important as the Dutch one in the 70s.  It's a shame that Peruvian generation doesn't get the same marketing as all other golden football generations aside from the Dutch one because THEY changed football forever.  Anyone that loves football for real should learn about that Peruvian generation of footballers because they were amazing...  A team, a machine!

58db93b9c8754.jpeg

It all started after that mauling of Alianza Lima against Huracán in the Copa Libertadores...  That aggression the players received changed many things. ;)

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26 minutes ago, RandoEFC said:

Do you know what TL;DR stands for? :ph34r:

xD

It's all in the context or content mate! O.o

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5 hours ago, Spike said:

Did you ever get bashed in school for being a foreign poof?

O.o

Actually I had my fair share of scraps at school. :$

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Are communists real human beans?           

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If as boy; the Real Madrid castilla or the Tottenham youth academy wished to sign you; would you have accepted? Would your parents have allowed ot?

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11 hours ago, Cannabis said:
  • How are you finding being a father? What advice would you give to the rest of us?

It's the most wonderful and fulfilling experience in the world.  Watching your child grow and learn is something extraordinary...  Having your child express faith in you with the way he/she looks into your eyes and holds out hi/her hand for reassurance is a gift from the gods.  Having your child express its love for you in the way he/she knows how to is....  Actually there are no words to describe that feeling.

But...  There's always a but to everything.  It's bloody knackering!  I have never been so tired in my life because it's mental and physical...  You never stop doing things and you're always thinking 100mph.

I would recommend we all take our clothes off so as to not sweat so much which would lead to more breathing and overusing the oxygen left in the lift.  I would then tell them that I am recording the event just for scientific reasons and that they shouldn't worry too much, especially when I touch them...  down there!...  It's all going to be ok boyssssssss.... :shutup::whistling:

  • You have just replaced Stan Kroenke as the chairman/owner of Arsenal Football Club - what would change under your rule?

I would sack Wenger, buy him a gold watch and thank him for the services he gave the club back in the day.  Employ a top technical director that is used to scrapping for signing quality players and tell him to build a team and network behind him (I have enough money to pay all these people with the wages Wenger no longer receives)...  The millions I have left over from Wenger's wages I will use to reduce prices on season tickets for those fans that are on very low income...  Something like that off the top of my head.  But if you gave me plenty of time I could work out a brilliant structure that's fair for everyone and would much Arsenal FC into the football era we are now living.

I would use the tons of red wine to get everyone drunk to the point of not knowing who they are...  (All this I'm thinking about as if I weren't married of course) Nudge would decide she wants to be naked a lot and I would "reluctantly" tell her it's ok to do so and that she should stay attached to me at all moments...  Then I would convince you that you are a registrar at Islington Council and Josh I would convince him that he's a female tiger (this part is on the side)...  I would record the session with the male tiger and Josh which would make me extra money (from the sale of the videos) so as to sign more players at Arsenal and seeing as I'm now the owner of Arsenal FC.  Back to what's going on at my house...  I would convince a very drunk FOYM that he's VanPanna's daughter and that he had a sex change because he was really in love with his dad because he reminds him/her of Arthur Fowler from Eastenders who he has a sexual fixation on (I would also record how that one works out).

Ok...  Back to you now believing you're a council registrar...  I would then give most of the wine to both 6666 and Dealinesman who would be so drunk that they will do anything.  We would break into Islington Town Hall where we would marry both Dealinesman and 6666 (Deadlinesman being bald would be the female obviously...  Just put a wig on him/her) and using the tons of glitter as confetti at the end of such a wonderful evening of fun and games.  I would dump all of you on the street, set off both the real tiger and Josh the "female tiger" with a steak stuck to his bottom roaming free around Islington's streets.  Then I would take Nudge home with me because she needs my help on a few things.  :hh:

  • Thoughts on the current MotoGP season?

It's probably the most uncertain season in decades.  I can't predict what will happen but if it continues the same we could be in for the greatest finale ever.  It's such a shame nobody other than you and myself are interested in it here because THAT'S MOTOR RACING and not what F1 has become.

  • If @Stan was replaced with a chimpanzee do you think we would notice a difference?

xD Not sure...  Would the Chimp have a fixation with turning every small letter into a capital letter at the start of every word? :ph34r:

  • Who is the most underrated member of TalkFootball365?

I don't think you can ever be "underrated" in something such as this or even on social media.  You become evident and your activity makes you stand out I would say.  It's just a shame there isn't more activity which would make it all so much more diverse...  Maybe the start of the new season may make this occur.

  • Was Ernesto Valverde a good appointment for FC Barcelona and how do you think the team will perform this season? 

According to those in the know, yes indeed Valverde's appointment is the correct one.  It would've been easier to go for the obvious big names connected with the club such as Koeman or maybe Laudrup.  But from listening to people that really are in the know about what's needed at the club, Valverde was always the correct appointment to make.  Obviously these things are all theory and only time will tell as to whether he can handle this sort of dressing room or not.  Luis Enrique who is a hard character even had issues at the start marking down his authority.

  • You are going into space and can take 3 TalkFootball365 members with you - who goes?

hahaha...  I would take Spike who would sit next to me and I would talk to him about thousands of different issues...  Then I'd take Tesso and Brian who would entertain us both with their bickering. xD I would also make sure I didn't forget my gun just in case...  :shoot::whistling:

  • How many underwear selfies have you taken at Grandma's house this year? 

hehehe...  Tons!  I'll send them to you via PM. :P

 

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12 hours ago, Teso Dos Bichos said:

Hows your cooking ?

My cooking is brilliant...  I am actually very very good!

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6 hours ago, VanPanna said:

Wenger in or out now😁

Wenger out mate...  What's changed!  Nothing whatsoever.  We are still controlled in total by him.  To be honest, I don't care anymore.

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5 hours ago, Spike said:

Are communists real human beans?           

Do Communists actually still exist anymore?

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5 hours ago, Spike said:

If as boy; the Real Madrid castilla or the Tottenham youth academy wished to sign you; would you have accepted? Would your parents have allowed ot?

Of course I would've accepted.  My mum hates football and my dad (no longer with us on earth) didn't particularly like either Barça or Real Madrid so he would've told me to sign for either Celta or Deportivo. xD

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Favorite Arsenal player past an present?

Favorite Arsenal game?

Best Chelsea player?

Favorite sex position?

Tits or ass?

Favorite Bosnian on the forum?

Do you play any sports?

Do you have wet dreams about Barcelona?

Would Messi get arse raped in prison?

Who do you think Uefa sucks off the most after Real and Barcelona?

Top 5 teams in Europe?

Best Arsenal season, name three and none can be the invincible's one.

Up for a quick wank?

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1 hour ago, True Blue said:

Favorite Arsenal player past an present?

As a kid my favourite Arsenal player was Liam Brady...  Brilliant player and a class act.

Present...  You mean the present team?  If that's the case then obviously Alexis Sánchez.

Favorite Arsenal game?

A true Arsenal fan can only have one game above all others.

Liverpool 0-2 Arsenal (1989 - Title Decider)

For me one of the greatest moments in football history ever anywhere for so many reasons.

Best Chelsea player?

In the modern era it has to be Gianfranco Zola for me.

Favorite sex position?

Woof! Woof! :censored:

Tits or ass?

Ass all the way!  Nothing as wonderful as a round peachy arse on a woman.

Favorite Bosnian on the forum?

There aren't any...  Although my favourite Serbian is you! xD

Do you play any sports?

- Football (Futsal)

- Tennis

- Pádel (don't know if you know what this is but it's massive in Spain)

- Cycling

Do you have wet dreams about Barcelona?

Indeed...  An unbelievable club that can only be fully understood by immersing yourself in its history.

Would Messi get arse raped in prison?

He's too ugly for that...  I think he'd be able to do his sentence in relative peace in that sense hahaha

Who do you think Uefa sucks off the most after Real and Barcelona?

I think this goes in cycles depending on the dish of the day.  I personally believe dodgy stuff goes on both in European competition and domestic stuff too.

Top 5 teams in Europe?

In no specific order and put them alphabetically for that reason.

Presently these five obviously...

- Atlético Madrid

- Barcelona

- Bayern Munich

- Juventus

- Real Madrid

Best Arsenal season, name three and none can be the invincible's one.

1st - 1989 (this one above The Invincibles)

2nd - 1971 (Double)

3rd - 2002 (Double)

Up for a quick wank?

Do I have to wear a condom this time though? :banana:

 

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Have you visited Ewood Park before? If yes, how many times and favourite memory?

Best Blackburn Rovers player you've seen live?

Favourite rapper/hip hop artist? Even if you're not into the genre..

Favourite sport at the Olympics?

Top 5 greatest sportsmen across all sports of all time?

Elaborate more on the time you shagged one of your pupils.... :ph34r:

 

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6 hours ago, SirBalon said:

Do Communists actually still exist anymore?

Why do you answer a question with another question?

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7 hours ago, SirBalon said:

I would recommend we all take our clothes off so as to not sweat so much which would lead to more breathing and overusing the oxygen left in the lift.  I would then tell them that I am recording the event just for scientific reasons and that they shouldn't worry too much, especially when I touch them...  down there!...  It's all going to be ok boyssssssss.... :shutup::whistling:

daddy no

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1 hour ago, Spike said:

Why do you answer a question with another question?

Because I don't know the answer mate.  I've haven't met a proper Communist in the past 25 years.

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20 minutes ago, SirBalon said:

Because I don't know the answer mate.  I've haven't met a proper Communist in the past 25 years.

Image result for communist bronies

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28 minutes ago, Spike said:

Image result for communist bronies

As I said mate... Haven't met a proper Communist in over 25 years. I don't listen to intellectuals or those that fall party to stupidity. Although I know plenty of that type you've posted right now. 

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why the name 'SirBalon'?

If you were an animal for a day what would you be?

Who's the most inspirational person you have met (not in your family)?

Any brothers or sisters?

Did you go to school in the UK?

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Why is abbreviated such a long word?

Do you think any kind of afterlife exists?

Do you think it is actually necessary to nail down the lid of a coffin?

Not including property, what is the most expensive item you have ever bought, and for how much?

When driving to an address you don't know do you turn down the volume of the stereo when looking for your destination?

What would your three wishes be [and no wishing for more wishes]?

Do you think the best part of your life has already happened?

Do you pee in the shower?

Do you vet calls?

What is your favourite cheese?

 

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What do you think about Ajax, within 2 years they have lost their Hero Johan and now one of the most promising young players for a while.   Its a very sad period for the club. 

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