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It's Time To End The Style Atrocity Of The Super Skinny Jean

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To be clear: the skinny jean in its original black guise has a rightful place in the history of men's fashion, the kind championed by Hedi Slimane during his time at Dior Homme, and later at Saint Laurent. The kind worn by tall, skinny, Rizla-rolling types since at least 2009. 

But, there's an unholy modern mutation of the skinny jean that we need to talk about. One lurking in the back of the provincial nightclub and in the changing room of a thousand branches of Fitness First; being forced on after another MASSIVE leg day. Denim sausage casings covering the waxed quads of a million guys who have their white coupes on finance and still call every other male in a bar "Fella." Possibly "Big Fella," if you're quite big.

We are of course talking about the super skinny (preferably ripped) jean, a trend, if we can call it that, that has been brought screeching back to our attention thanks to trash TV obsession of the millisecond Love Island.

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Fucking Love Island.

Now we're not going to pretend that we watch ITV's latest saviour 'ironically' or that it's a piece of 'no brow' culture that deserves coy appraisal in usually sneering intelligentsia circles... it's not. It's the Mail Online 'sidebar of shame' played out IRL. It's for people who want to see people shag on TV without actually admitting that they want to see people shag on TV. It's Big Brother with abs, and it's awful.

But we're not here to talk about Love Island, we're here to talk about the state of the jeans worn by the men on Love Island, and what that says about the reluctant progress of men's style in this grey-skied and fearful slab of land bobbing in the North Sea. 

Like Britain's Worst Style Crime before it, the super skinny jean represents a nadir in our nation's taste in clothing, a cockroach of a fad that seems to cling on just when you thought that its days were numbered (they even come in white now: white?!). But while the epidemic of square-toed pleather shoes show British men at our most slobbish, the super skinny jean shows us at our most excruciatingly vain.

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Scan the floor the next time you're in any mid-sized town or city bar and you'll notice, if you haven't already, the gym-going uniform of the Watford Gap Warrior: tight white shirt, skiiiiiiiny jeans, no socks and brown loafers. A million tanned Dans trying their best to peacock while, of course, all looking exactly the same.

Men have never had so much choice when it comes to trousers and jeans: wide-leg, cropped, high-waisted and, yes, skinny are all being utilised by stylish guys near and far. The problem comes when your trousers are worn solely for drawing attention to your massive pumped quads. Because honestly: how else can you explain the logic behind these jeans that look bad and feel awful to wear?

Your trousers should form one part of a cohesive outfit, the (usually) understated, dignified plinth upon which your look is built. Not a cling-filmed signpost to the fact that yes, you go to the fucking gym. 

No one cares you go to the gym. But trust us: they are sick and tired of seeing every pumped crevice of your over-worked bottom half.

Source: Esquire Magazine

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 Yep pretty much! 

Mens clothing is more revealing these days than women's clothing. 

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I like them and don't ever wear jeans unless their slim fit. 

Some of those are too tight though, particularly the denim and white ones. 

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9 minutes ago, Cicero said:

I like them and don't ever wear jeans unless their slim fit. 

Some of those are too tight though, particularly the denim and white ones. 

Slim fit is one thing (very fashionable), but these are two styles tighter because after slim-fit comes skinny and then this atrocity called super skinny which you see so many weirdos wear and they seem to have become popular in the manner the article says.

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Ironic this, because if you asked me to bet on who here wears white skintight jeans I'd go for @SirBalon every time :ph34r:

22 minutes ago, Harry said:

 Yep pretty much! 

Mens clothing is more revealing these days than women's clothing. 

Very true, and it's not just that men's clothes are getting tighter. I've noticed that a lot of the more fashion-conscious girls I know have started wearing baggier clothes these days (boyfriend jeans, for example). I think they're hideous myself and they do no favours for girls who are actually in good shape.

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I wore skinny jeans when I was 15. That is where they belong. 

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I wear slim fit but never skinny, wore skinny once and that was because of my washing machine 😂

I miss baggyish light blue jeans

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I used to wear them in my late teens / early twenties but other time ive acknowledged that they just make it look you look like you have skipped leg day at the gym.

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7 hours ago, Danny said:

I miss baggyish light blue jeans

Straight jeans are back in fashion mate, so you can wear them without being afraid.

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23 minutes ago, SirBalon said:

Straight jeans are back in fashion mate, so you can wear them without being afraid.

I wore them throughout the height of the chino phase mate so no worries there but I live in Aus currently and it's fucking boiling haha

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4 minutes ago, Danny said:

I wore them throughout the height of the chino phase mate so no worries there but I live in Aus currently and it's fucking boiling haha

Only one thing for it mate... shorts!

Although in those weather conditions I’d wear speedos everywhere.  Send us pictures if you try this! :x

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Just now, SirBalon said:

Only one thing for it mate... shorts!

Although in those weather conditions I’d wear speedos everywhere.  Send us pictures if you try this! :x

Speedos are for paedos 

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1 minute ago, Danny said:

Speedos are for paedos 

Not if you wear really tight ones and don’t do your bikini line mate.  Honestly, give it a go. :ph34r:

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It's an epidemic these days. Lads that spend half (or more) of their lives in front of the mirror or in the gym and then wear the tightest trousers and shirts possible to show off their muscles, most of which are bang average.

I believe skinny jeans started with teenagers who got into either indie or goth culture about 15 years ago. Now it's just everyone.

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11 minutes ago, RandoEFC said:

It's an epidemic these days. Lads that spend half (or more) of their lives in front of the mirror or in the gym and then wear the tightest trousers and shirts possible to show off their muscles, most of which are bang average.

I believe skinny jeans started with teenagers who got into either indie or goth culture about 15 years ago. Now it's just everyone.

That's mainstream culture to a tee though. When I was growing up you got absolutely destroyed for wearing converse and now everyone wears them not just the skater kids.

Even slang, 10-15 years ago if you used certain words you were considered a massive chav, now you've got northerners and websites like Ladbible going around saying fam, calling everything sick and wearing snapbacks (which were once largely a black culture thing and anyone not black would be considered a wigga)

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9 minutes ago, RandoEFC said:

It's an epidemic these days. Lads that spend half (or more) of their lives in front of the mirror or in the gym and then wear the tightest trousers and shirts possible to show off their muscles, most of which are bang average.

I believe skinny jeans started with teenagers who got into either indie or goth culture about 15 years ago. Now it's just everyone.

The real black skinny jean goes all the way back to the rock era from the Rolling Stones to later on Bon Jovi and Guns n’ Roses... It was a statement of sorts and connected to fashion because it’s obviously a garment you wear.  What we have in the article and its depiction of that terrible reality show is like you say, a show of what men have become.

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A point of view from our resident female member @nudge would be really interesting in all of this because motives behind what someone wears fashion wise many times is directed toward the opposite sex.

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1 hour ago, SirBalon said:

A point of view from our resident female member @nudge would be really interesting in all of this because motives behind what someone wears fashion wise many times is directed toward the opposite sex.

I thought my point of view was expressed quite clearly here: 

6 hours ago, nudge said:

Eeeeeew.

xD 

Seriously though, I personally don't find that attractive at the slightest. Slim fit and "normal" skinny jeans are fine, this just looks like a pair of leggings that are too tight. 

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1 hour ago, nudge said:

I thought my point of view was expressed quite clearly here: 

xD 

Seriously though, I personally don't find that attractive at the slightest. Slim fit and "normal" skinny jeans are fine, this just looks like a pair of leggings that are too tight. 

Yeah I saw that post but I wanted you to elaborate because the answer you’ve given is actually the one practically every woman answers.  They’ve done a number of polls and brief interviews with hundreds of women in the western world (because the western world is the one most affected by fashion consumerism) and they all went along the lines that they don’t want a man dressing like a woman (more or less what you’ve just said) because it’s not sexy and then onto issues like men showing off their bodies in a narcissistic manner which also puts women off.

If you observe those pictures and manage to clear your mind off the fashion you see everyday on the streets by thinking in a neutral manner, those men look absolutely ridiculous and I mean the word ridiculous in the most accentuated form of the word.

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4 minutes ago, SirBalon said:

Yeah I saw that post but I wanted you to elaborate because the answer you’ve given is actually the one practically every woman answers.  They’ve done a number of polls and brief interviews with hundreds of women in the western world (because the western world is the one most affected by fashion consumerism) and they all went along the lines that they don’t want a man dressing like a woman (more or less what you’ve just said) because it’s not sexy and then onto issues like men showing off their bodies in a narcissistic manner which also puts women off.

If you observe those pictures and manage to clear your mind off the fashion you see everyday on the streets by thinking in a neutral manner, those men look absolutely ridiculous and I mean the word ridiculous in the most accentuated form of the word.

I must admit I've always been a bit of an old school when it comes to things like that in general, though. Also, after spending 4 years far away from Europe, it just blows my mind a little bit because nobody dresses like that here - not a single person, despite of age or nationality, so it probably looks even more ridiculous to me than you can imagine, haha. 

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15 minutes ago, nudge said:

I must admit I've always been a bit of an old school when it comes to things like that in general, though. Also, after spending 4 years far away from Europe, it just blows my mind a little bit because nobody dresses like that here - not a single person, despite of age or nationality, so it probably looks even more ridiculous to me than you can imagine, haha. 

Indeed... Where you’ve been inhabiting over the recent past has surely cleared your mind off of all the meaningless rubbish we’re conditioned to think in the West.  It’s obviously giving you the correct direction in how you view and appreciate otherly things that in reality have absolutely no importance.

But... And it’s an important but.  In the West you have to appreciate the fact that life runs at a different rate and thought process.  A process that isn’t about to be changed radically no matter how much some intellectuals think it’s possible.  Aside from all of that, it is the clear mind in a case such as yours and even others where a contaminated one feeds us almost identical information gives us an answer that when looked upon and then observed in the sense of a continuance, we find the whole thing strangely off putting.

It’s obvious that looks terrible aesthetically, but even understanding and accepting that, you will then get people with bodies that aren’t as gracefully  (narcissism) manipulated falling into the trap and wearing something that from the obscene we arrive at the abhorrent.

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3 minutes ago, SirBalon said:

Indeed... Where you’ve been inhabiting over the recent past has surely cleared your mind off of all the meaningless rubbish we’re conditioned to think in the West.  It’s obviously giving you the correct direction in how you view and appreciate otherly things that in reality have absolutely no importance.

But... And it’s an important but.  In the West you have to appreciate the fact that life runs at a different rate and thought process.  A process that isn’t about to be changed radically no matter how much some intellectuals think it’s possible.  Aside from all of that, it is the clear mind in a case such as yours and even others where a contaminated one feeds us almost identical information gives us an answer that when looked upon and then observed in the sense of a continuance, we find the whole thing strangely off putting.

It’s obvious that looks terrible aesthetically, but even understanding and accepting that, you will then get people with bodies that aren’t as gracefully  (narcissism) manipulated falling into the trap and wearing something that from the obscene we arrive at the abhorrent.

To be fair, having spent most of my formative years growing up in a post-Soviet country, I've already been conditioned to think differently than the same generation in the West. 

That said, every decade and every culture has gone through some silly fashion trends that looked completely ridiculous, so this is not something completely new... 

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The arcticle seems to suggest that this is a British problem but this nonsense is going on everywhere. Awful. Never got a pair but do they come with an arm tattoo and an undercut? It does look like it over here.

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Those jeans are 'super skinny to be fair. Normal skinny jeans are just a little bit tighter than the slim fit. I wear skinny jeans but they are never tight against my legs. I hate baggy jeans cause you just look either like a trollop or some old dad with no style....balon. 

These are the 'skinny' jeans I'll wear. I don't think there's anything wrong with the fit on them.

https://m.asos.com/asos/asos-plus-stretch-slim-jeans-in-dark-wash-blue/prd/8779973?CTARef=Saved Items Image

I just realised those jeans say slim haha, but the skinny ones I have are the exact same. 

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