Jump to content
talkfootball365
  • Welcome to talkfootball365!

    The better place to talk football.

Dating, Relationships and Marriage Thread


football forums

Recommended Posts

Sign up to remove this ad.
  • Replies 1.5k
  • Created
  • Last Reply
  • Subscriber

I've had the mare of all mares. I don't really know how to put all this but fuck it.

So the girl at work I'm dead close with, think something will happen with etc....

She's pregnant.

She didn't plan for it but she's keeping it. She's making such a fucking error but what the hell can you do?

Honestly the shittest situation I can remember being in. She's in a volatile, unhappy relationship and I'd wager good money that they don't last anyway. This is a terrible situation for basically everybody but she can't see it.

The problem is I'm still a friend to her. It's so hard to watch happen to someone I care about a lot. Other than her parents and lifelong best friend, I'm the only person who knows. I can't drop anyone who is like that with me.

I think it puts paid to anything happening between me and her, certainly any time soon, but even if one day we did get together we've now got her and this idiot connected for good.

Be arsed with this during the period of no distractions as well. What a mess. I'm pretty gutted.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • Administrator

She's taken extreme measures @Dan but I don't think she wants to be with you :ph34r:

 

In all seriousness, sorry to hear that and sounds like a right mess. Could be a blessing in disguise that you don't get involved with that baggage considering there was nothing serious going on anyway...

Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • Subscriber
1 minute ago, Stan said:

She's taken extreme measures @Dan but I don't think she wants to be with you :ph34r:

 

In all seriousness, sorry to hear that and sounds like a right mess. Could be a blessing in disguise that you don't get involved with that baggage considering there was nothing serious going on anyway...

It's horrific to be honest. She isn't thinking what so ever. Could have been so, so different.

It may all turn out a blessing in disguise but it's quite hard to see it that way at the minute. It's not somebody I can just bin off like that. I've got work things to do with her including a quite big assignment. I can't cut her out at all.

Just sickening. There is no doubt in my mind this is a huge error from her and I think she'll realise it one day.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Dan, sometimes you get a big sign from the universe that hurts like fuck but may just be the jolt you need. This is one of those moments for you. No doubt gutting for you, but in the long run you’ll look back at this and breathe a sign of relief. 
 

As for contributing to the topic with my own issues? Well, let’s put it this way; my love love is an exact mirror of Chandler’s, series 1-3. Women mostly hate me, and I can’t think of anything I’d less rather do than be in a relationship 🤷‍♂️😂

Link to comment
Share on other sites

53 minutes ago, Dan said:

I've had the mare of all mares. I don't really know how to put all this but fuck it.

So the girl at work I'm dead close with, think something will happen with etc....

She's pregnant.

She didn't plan for it but she's keeping it. She's making such a fucking error but what the hell can you do?

Honestly the shittest situation I can remember being in. She's in a volatile, unhappy relationship and I'd wager good money that they don't last anyway. This is a terrible situation for basically everybody but she can't see it.

The problem is I'm still a friend to her. It's so hard to watch happen to someone I care about a lot. Other than her parents and lifelong best friend, I'm the only person who knows. I can't drop anyone who is like that with me.

I think it puts paid to anything happening between me and her, certainly any time soon, but even if one day we did get together we've now got her and this idiot connected for good.

Be arsed with this during the period of no distractions as well. What a mess. I'm pretty gutted.

Run for the hills mate, not sure if this is the same girl you’ve mentioned before or if she’s new but things shouldn’t be this hard. If there’s something in it it’ll happen naturally, if you’re watching from a distance as a friend you’re gunna get yourself in trouble imo, never actually get with her and be unhappy watching, get caught cheating or finally get her and end up in an unhappy relationship cos you wanted it more than you needed it.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • Subscriber
1 hour ago, Rick said:

Dan, sometimes you get a big sign from the universe that hurts like fuck but may just be the jolt you need. This is one of those moments for you. No doubt gutting for you, but in the long run you’ll look back at this and breathe a sign of relief. 
 

As for contributing to the topic with my own issues? Well, let’s put it this way; my love love is an exact mirror of Chandler’s, series 1-3. Women mostly hate me, and I can’t think of anything I’d less rather do than be in a relationship 🤷‍♂️😂

Quite possibly mate. I'm under no illusions that this probably puts paid to anything happening with me and her but it's sickening. Like this is more than just a little thing for somebody I work with - like I say, I know this before her brother, sister and grandparents. This ain't just somebody I can drop like that even if that may save me some hurt.

 

53 minutes ago, Danny said:

Run for the hills mate, not sure if this is the same girl you’ve mentioned before or if she’s new but things shouldn’t be this hard. If there’s something in it it’ll happen naturally, if you’re watching from a distance as a friend you’re gunna get yourself in trouble imo, never actually get with her and be unhappy watching, get caught cheating or finally get her and end up in an unhappy relationship cos you wanted it more than you needed it.

Same girl mate. Problem is today I've also realised watching from a distance isn't really an option either. I'm very much close to her. I've also realised she's reckless and that's a slight put-off really.

Just one of them where time will tell but ultimately I see no winners in this and those who think they've won - haven't.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • Administrator
1 hour ago, Rick said:

Dan, sometimes you get a big sign from the universe that hurts like fuck but may just be the jolt you need. This is one of those moments for you. No doubt gutting for you, but in the long run you’ll look back at this and breathe a sign of relief. 
 

As for contributing to the topic with my own issues? Well, let’s put it this way; my love love is an exact mirror of Chandler’s, series 1-3. Women mostly hate me, and I can’t think of anything I’d less rather do than be in a relationship 🤷‍♂️😂

You need an absolute nutter to get you through

giphy.gif

Link to comment
Share on other sites

@Eco Far out that was a rollercoaster for me to read, I can't imagine living it.

In my experience I've always found people think they can change people. And while you can make slow exterior changes to a person over months or years you will never change a persons core. Anyone trying to is playing a fools game. I hope you find happiness with some time to yourself and a stress free girl is around the corner, even but for a while. 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • 3 weeks later...
  • 1 month later...
On 24/02/2020 at 20:45, Storts said:

Wish I was as positive now as I was then, and this is probably the wrong thread for this, but my anxiety has developed into depression, and I'm really struggling. Today has been the lowest day I've ever had. No routine, no purpose, it's really hard. Still not working, but can't even motivate myself or concentrate long enough to even apply. Confidence completely shot, personally and professionally. Need to start making little changes I think, can only do this myself, and reach a real emotional low today that it's all I can do.

Sooo those that follow me on twitter will have seen but I started a new job yesterday amidst all this madness, not initially what I wanted to do, but it's a good opportunity in this crazy job market and I'm glad to have some purpose back in my life. Still have good days and bad days, but hopefully things are at least looking up. 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • Subscriber
18 minutes ago, Storts said:

Sooo those that follow me on twitter will have seen but I started a new job yesterday amidst all this madness, not initially what I wanted to do, but it's a good opportunity in this crazy job market and I'm glad to have some purpose back in my life. Still have good days and bad days, but hopefully things are at least looking up. 

As I said life goes on buddy, keep your chin up and carry on, you are still young, it's been 2 years now that our son split up with his wife and the divorce went through about 3 months ago but they are still friends for the sake of wee Alexander who we have not seen since this bloody lockdown but our son is staying with us now and once the restrictions are over with we will all be back to normal and see ALL the grandsons.

He has had two relationships with 2 females since the divorce but nothing came out of it (except the zip on his pants :whistling:) so he is just taking his time and enjoying life, he has put his taxi job on hold for now as it was dead fare wise and that's him just gone for a run.

Our daughter is coping ok since the arse of a partner she had cheated on her, left her and got married the cow but Dee is a strong lady as we bought her up that way, this Coronavirus has stopped her or us visiting and we miss the grandsons like nothing on earth but a video cam on my mobile and laptops come in handy.

In all enjoy your new job buddy, look in the mirror when you first get up and say to yourself with a smile  "I am young, just get on with life you ugly looking bastard"

Link to comment
Share on other sites

6 hours ago, CaaC (John) said:

As I said life goes on buddy, keep your chin up and carry on, you are still young, it's been 2 years now that our son split up with his wife and the divorce went through about 3 months ago but they are still friends for the sake of wee Alexander who we have not seen since this bloody lockdown but our son is staying with us now and once the restrictions are over with we will all be back to normal and see ALL the grandsons.

He has had two relationships with 2 females since the divorce but nothing came out of it (except the zip on his pants :whistling:) so he is just taking his time and enjoying life, he has put his taxi job on hold for now as it was dead fare wise and that's him just gone for a run.

Our daughter is coping ok since the arse of a partner she had cheated on her, left her and got married the cow but Dee is a strong lady as we bought her up that way, this Coronavirus has stopped her or us visiting and we miss the grandsons like nothing on earth but a video cam on my mobile and laptops come in handy.

In all enjoy your new job buddy, look in the mirror when you first get up and say to yourself with a smile  "I am young, just get on with life you ugly looking bastard"

Thanks Dad 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

8 hours ago, Storts said:

Sooo those that follow me on twitter will have seen but I started a new job yesterday amidst all this madness, not initially what I wanted to do, but it's a good opportunity in this crazy job market and I'm glad to have some purpose back in my life. Still have good days and bad days, but hopefully things are at least looking up. 

Good to hear mate. Definitely a good time to be in work and good that it's brought a bit of routine.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • 2 weeks later...
  • Subscriber

I got a question for you married folks and @Stan How much did you spend on your enagement/wedding rings? I dont need exact numbers just an idea. Google tells me the average these days is two months salary? I make a decent wage but that seems insane to me? Maybe im just out of touch? 

Basically Ive been with my girlfriend for almost 6 years now, weve lived together for 2 years. Im not going to propose yet but it was just on my mind in recent days with not much going on in the world Ive been thinking about starting to put aside money to buy a ring. Basically were looking to buy a place in the next year or two and thats sort of when I was thinking about proposing in that time frame as well. 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

4 minutes ago, Viva la FCB said:

I got a question for you married folks and @Stan How much did you spend on your enagement/wedding rings? I dont need exact numbers just an idea. Google tells me the average these days is two months salary? I make a decent wage but that seems insane to me? Maybe im just out of touch? 

No, you're not. Just people being materialistic. I've literally had people bragging to me that their diamond was naturally made vs laboratory made. As if I could give a shit and even notice a difference. 

My advise, find something you can afford to make monthly payments on. Speak with her friends/colleagues on what types of rings she likes, and then find the best option available based on your financial limits. 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

1 minute ago, Viva la FCB said:

I got a question for you married folks and @Stan How much did you spend on your enagement/wedding rings? I dont need exact numbers just an idea. Google tells me the average these days is two months salary? I make a decent wage but that seems insane to me? Maybe im just out of touch? 

Basically Ive been with my girlfriend for almost 6 years now, weve lived together for 2 years. Im not going to propose yet but it was just on my mind in recent days with not much going on in the world Ive been thinking about starting to put aside money to buy a ring. Basically were looking to buy a place in the next year or two and thats sort of when I was thinking about proposing in that time frame as well. 

I wouldn't worry about the cost so much as what it means to her.. Some women like flashy big expensive rings and others are just happy with something that means a lot but not in a monetary way if that makes any sense?? I mean you obviously know her better than all of us so is she a material person by nature or not??? Are you planning on it being a surprise or buying it together?? 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • Subscriber

cheers guys,

3 minutes ago, Bluewolf said:

I wouldn't worry about the cost so much as what it means to her.. Some women like flashy big expensive rings and others are just happy with something that means a lot but not in a monetary way if that makes any sense?? I mean you obviously know her better than all of us so is she a material person by nature or not??? Are you planning on it being a surprise or buying it together?? 

Shes not materialistic at all, Ill be picking it out alone or with one of her friends and it will definitely be a surprise kind of deal :D

Link to comment
Share on other sites

You could always do what I did and let her choose it then I paid for it and let her pay me back in instalments over the next year or so... Although she missed the last 2 months of that repayment period I was prepared to let it go because having to pay me back meant she went for the cheapest one she could find... 

Just a bit of a life hack there for you mate going forward... 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • Administrator
5 minutes ago, Viva la FCB said:

I got a question for you married folks and @Stan How much did you spend on your enagement/wedding rings? I dont need exact numbers just an idea. Google tells me the average these days is two months salary? I make a decent wage but that seems insane to me? Maybe im just out of touch? 

Basically Ive been with my girlfriend for almost 6 years now, weve lived together for 2 years. Im not going to propose yet but it was just on my mind in recent days with not much going on in the world Ive been thinking about starting to put aside money to buy a ring. Basically were looking to buy a place in the next year or two and thats sort of when I was thinking about proposing in that time frame as well. 

Don't worry about cost mate. Anyone saying it has to be an X amount of salary is chatting shit. Since when does salary or amount you earn dictate something like that? Agree with @Cicero saying it's people being materialistic.

My fiancé and I went shopping a few times to see what kinds of styles she likes and also to get her finger size as well so at least I knew what exactly she needed and that it would fit the day I asked her. I went shopping myself a few times to see what I could get and what I could afford in line with what she liked. 

Thankfully a colleague I worked with knew someone who worked in the jewellery quarter in Birmingham. So I gave them the requirements and my budget. They managed to create the ring (so it's unique) and I got it £750 cheaper than I would have if I went to a normal retail shop. Of course money isn't everything but I love a saving. I spent less than one months salary on it and its still high quality in the gradings like colour, clarity, cut and size. 

Go with what feels right mate. The most expensive ring might be totally horrid and not what your missus wants. The biggest cut might be ugly and not fitting for her. 

I'd advise to do your research and don't just go to one shop :)

 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

3 minutes ago, Viva la FCB said:

cheers guys,

Shes not materialistic at all, Ill be picking it out alone or with one of her friends and it will definitely be a surprise kind of deal :D

If you want to surprise her mate get her a Kinder Egg... 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Archived

This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.

  • Recently Browsing   0 members

    • No registered users viewing this page.

Sign up or subscribe to remove this ad.


×
×
  • Create New...