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Dating, Relationships and Marriage Thread

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By Batard
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nudge+

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11 minutes ago, Devil-Dick Willie said:

Oi @nudge I've taken a Finnish girl on a couple of dates, beautiful and kind, if a tad dorky and innocent. Speaks great English but it's still a second language, She seems very guarded and reserved compared to Aussie women. Is this a cultural thing or just her? Any tips on weird Euro women?

If she's Finnish and is talking to you in full sentences, then it's already a great achievement and a sign that she likes you xD

In all seriousness, there are of course individual differences, but in general, Finns are very reserved and might come across as "cold", so it's definitely a cultural thing, I'd say. As for tips? Don't know, people are different... Maybe respect her personal space a bit more than you'd normally do. 

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Devil-Dick Willie

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2 minutes ago, nudge said:

If she's Finnish and is talking to you in full sentences, then it's already a great achievement and a sign that she likes you xD

In all seriousness, there are of course individual differences, but in general, Finns are very reserved and might come across as "cold", so it's definitely a cultural thing, I'd say. As for tips? Don't know, people are different... Maybe respect her personal space a bit more than you'd normally do. 


Yeah I got right on that first date, I've been far less "wild" and not at all forward. She laughs at my jokes and seems to enjoy our time, but yeah hard to read and very laid back and reserved. And while I'm not complaining I'm used to 2 dates bringing more action than a cuddle and kiss on the cheek. Australian women looking for a date literally throw themselves at you if interested, and ones looking for a root literally need 30 minutes to an hour conversation at most, less if you've got a gram. Meanwhile here I am hahahaha. 
 

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Bluewolf

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6 minutes ago, Devil-Dick Willie said:

Australian women looking for a date literally throw themselves at you if interested, and ones looking for a root literally need 30 minutes to an hour conversation at most, less if you've got a gram.

Speed dating must be fun over there then... from what you are saying you have enough time to have sex with 2 or 3 of them before the evenings over... 

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Devil-Dick Willie

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1 minute ago, Toinho said:

Everyone’s experiences are different. Seems he’s finally met a respectable woman. Welcome. 

This is frightening, I get all my signals from my cock being grabbed, or being followed around to the point of harassment. how do I read the actions of a person whos not outwardly trying to put her finger in my bum??? Send help. 

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Stan

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41 minutes ago, Toinho said:

Everyone’s experiences are different. Seems he’s finally met a respectable woman. Welcome. 

 

33 minutes ago, Devil-Dick Willie said:

This is frightening, I get all my signals from my cock being grabbed, or being followed around to the point of harassment. how do I read the actions of a person whos not outwardly trying to put her finger in my bum??? Send help. 

Get her on the forum so we can get her side of the story xD 

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Viva la FCB+

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On 19/08/2020 at 02:30, Devil-Dick Willie said:

Oi @nudge I've taken a Finnish girl on a couple of dates, beautiful and kind, if a tad dorky and innocent. Speaks great English but it's still a second language, She seems very guarded and reserved compared to Aussie women. Is this a cultural thing or just her? Any tips on weird Euro women?

Show her your magic collection, only way to test the waters. 

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Eco

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On 09/03/2020 at 21:49, Eco said:

So, it's about time for an update boys and girls. 

The wife and I have officially decided on divorce. I proposed what I planned for the financials (I make significantly more than her so I'll have to pay alimony), and then she came back with another proposal which I accepted. We had a serious talk last night, and we both agreed that we didn't want to fuck over the other, but wanted to find a solution that made everyone feel okay, and that's what I think we did. 

Tonight we told our daughter that 'Daddy will be living elsewhere', but that we are still a family and that both Mom and Dad both love her just as much as ever. I'll tell you now, that was one of the hardest things to do in my life. She's only 2.5 years old so all she wanted to do was watch 'Elisa' (Frozen), but still, it's incredibly painful to tell your daughter that you are leaving. 

I'll give my soon-to-be ex-wife props, she has done well since we decided that divorce is the next step, she is definitely getting in the family time while it's there, and keeping her emotions in check when we are in front of the daughter. 

I'll be living here for probably another 2 weeks, as we prepare the house to sell, and then I'm going to move in with my Dad while the house sells. Once it sells, the wife and I will split the profits, and she'll move into either a town home or an apartment I imagine, whereas I'll likely stay with my Dad for 2-3 months as I get my head wrapped around the fact that I'm 34 and divorced. 

 A lot of mixed emotions from me honestly. I hate that I'm leaving my previous daughter, but I know deep down that this is best for the future. My Dad said that I should spend some of the profits from the house to travel for a week, so I might be heading to Europe depending on how this virus goes, I would that I would get a cheap flight, but who knows. 

8 years with someone is a long time, and part of me feels like it's a miracle we made it this far, while another part of me hates that I'm just another 'failed marriage'. I have been with this woman for almost a decade, we have escaped death, raised a daughter, and have had both great and terrible times...to say that this was bittersweet would justify what exactly I'm feeling during this moment. 

Regardless, this is just the end of a section of my self novel, and now it's time to focus on the ending of it while also preparing for the next chapter.  

Funny how it works. The above post was written on March 9th (9/3), today is September 3rd (3/9) and things have changed more than I could have ever imagined. 

Soon after this post was written with 100% certainty on my end, COVID hit Atlanta hard and we as a city had the Shelter in Place order. Wife and I decided to live in the same house and see this out so that neither of us had to worry about outside containment during all the craziness that was the beginning of this pandemic. 

I'm not sure the exact time line, but maybe a week (or two?) after this, my wife and worked on setting up the house for our daughter, which included buying a pool, buying a playground, setting up a tent,  and even buying an inflatable bounce castle to keep her entertained while we were here. Slowly, while we were working on these mutual goals, we began talking more and more about the more 'serious' topics, and somehow our communication was much more open, honest, less judged then in the past, which allowed us to broach some serious topics we might have hidden otherwise. We continued to sleep in different rooms, but slowly our communication improved.

Then, my father got diagnosed with COVID, and my world certainly shifted. My Dad isn't in the best of health, and so I was certainly worried as I somewhat idolize my father. My wife, Leighton, helped me by just listening as I spoke to her about my concerns and fears with my father, and all she did was listen and be there for me. It's worth mentioning that my wife lost her mother to alcoholism and drugs the year before we met, and while they weren't close, she does have experience with losing a parent. 

One night, I was feeling really down about being locked in my house while my Dad was sick, and in her attempt to change the mood, my wife arranged a nice steak dinner outside after our child had gone to bed. She set up a temporary table we had stored in the garage, put some some classical favorites of mine in the background, and even lit up some candles so that we weren't in complete darkness. It was wonderful and without making this into a film you might see on some NSFW websites, we ended up having sex, which was the first time we had in months, and first time doing it with any sign of passion in possibly years. 

That night I slept in my bed again, and haven't left. We have continued to talk about all things, and worked together our underlying issues, and created a safe space for each of us to be open with our dreams, crazy ideas (I have a few), and things we want to accomplish, all with the understanding that the other person will listen and be supportive. Game Changer. 

So now, here we are and it's been maybe 3 or so months since this all took place. It's weird to read about my old stories, because it seems like so many moons ago. Have we had arguments? Absolutely! However, even those are different than they were before, they feel like they are done with better intentions than previous arguments, and we've had significantly better results. Wife has started a graduate program, understood and accepted our religious differences, and has been very supported with my goal of finding a new job and the idea of potentially moving over to Europe for a few years and getting our daughter (and us) a new experience. My wife has been having some medical issues going on, nothing life threatening, but certainly concerning, and I like to think I've been here supporting her 100% and that she knows, and is grateful for this new life we have together. 

NPR (National Public Radio) here in Atlanta, is wanting couples who relationships ended (or improved) during COVID, to just sit down and record themselves talking about where they were, where they are, and how this pandemic assisted in that process, and my Father swears that my wife and I should do this, and we very well may. I think it'd be a great experience for us to relive and remind ourselves how lucky we are for right now, because only months ago our worlds looked a look bleaker.

My father completely recovered, and everyone in my family has been nothing but healthy since. With all the craziness of 2020, it seems like I could argue that my life is better now than ever.

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Stan

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Amazingly happy for you @Eco that things seemed to have worked out and definitely improved. (On a separate note to this thread, glad your dad recovered from COVID too!).

I remember at the time 6 months ago and the time leading up to it, it was pretty much you wanted to rip each other's hearts out and not just mentally either! To come from that and read the above is great. A huge change. 

Do you feel it's a shame it took the COVID pandemic/Father getting COVID to get to the point to resolve your differences? Or do you think it would have happened anyway but just on a longer time-frame?

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Eco

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Just now, Stan said:

Amazingly happy for you @Eco that things seemed to have worked out and definitely improved. (On a separate note to this thread, glad your dad recovered from COVID too!).

I remember at the time 6 months ago and the time leading up to it, it was pretty much you wanted to rip each other's hearts out and not just mentally either! To come from that and read the above is great. A huge change. 

Do you feel it's a shame it took the COVID pandemic/Father getting COVID to get to the point to resolve your differences? Or do you think it would have happened anyway but just on a longer time-frame?

Cheers man! Just thought I'd update the forum since I made our troubles and divorce so public. 

I don't feel any shame the way things turned out, and the route it took. We have discussed that we both need to be cognizant of these moments for when life gets 'back to normal', we may fall into some of our bad habits. I think crazy things happen in life and the result can be surprisingly extremely positive, and when they do, analyzing the route is irrelevant while enjoying the moment is vital.  

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Eco

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Just now, Viva la FCB said:

Great to hear man. its funny how these things work out sometimes but it sounds like you guys are coming out the otherside stronger then ever. Really happy for you guys.

Thank you sir!

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Dr. Gonzo

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2 hours ago, Eco said:

Cheers man! Just thought I'd update the forum since I made our troubles and divorce so public. 

I don't feel any shame the way things turned out, and the route it took. We have discussed that we both need to be cognizant of these moments for when life gets 'back to normal', we may fall into some of our bad habits. I think crazy things happen in life and the result can be surprisingly extremely positive, and when they do, analyzing the route is irrelevant while enjoying the moment is vital.  

I haven't seen such positivity in 2020 since the 25th of July.

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CaaC (John)+

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Don't know how I missed this @Eco but hat's off to both of you for working things out and back together for good I hope, I always say that when you have kiddies things like divorces & separations make things a lot harder, I can say I know that when our son divorced his wife after 14 years and our daughter with her partner after 20 years myself & the wife were pillows to cry on from them both and the 3 grandsons.

But they are plodding along and speaking to their latter for the sake of the grandsons and things seem ok except for the daughter's ex being a bit of a bastard sometimes but everything has cooled down a bit now.

And I will end off by saying is have a second wedding together and invite all of us TF365 lot to the bash and we can all have a sing-along together, I can just imagine Spike & Devil-Dick Willie singing a duo together in their Australian twang and dressed up as kangaroos. :D

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